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  1. Beatdown Richie is offline
    Beatdown Richie's Avatar

    game dog

    Join Date
    Jan 2003
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    Munich, Germany
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    1,886

    Posted On:
    12/16/2005 3:13am

    supporting member
     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Matt Furey's Primate Power - LOL

    Just saw a thread on this on MMA.tv, check this out:

    http://www.mattfurey.com/primate_power.html

    Later today movie theatres all over the world are going to be PACKED for the release of the new and improved KING KONG. As a society we are mesmerized by the power of primates -and Mr. KONG is no exception. Even if he's make believe.

    But the POWER of PRIMATES doesn't need to be exaggerated.

    ...

    Real Men Develop Superior Strength by Training Like Primates

    There is no substitute for moving like a monkey and doing ape exercises just like they do in the jungle. If you think you can get gorilla strength from the bench press or the barbell curl, you're sadly mistaken. These are unnatural exercises for which we have no biological basis for doing. But we do for moving like primates. You see, within our DNA is programmed the genetic urge to develop our bodies like an ape.


    ....

    To get you there, Matt Furey and I have designed a course called The Primate Power Super Strength System. The sole purpose of this system is to give you the power of the apes. This program will give you true primate strength, no matter what your present level is. This is your opportunity to possess a functional power no one else has. A power which at times will make you feel invincible.

    ...

    The total amount for the entire Primate Power Super Strength System - which includes the course manual, three DVDs, beginner, intermediate and advanced workout programs plus the two live teleseminars - is only $349.00, a mere pittance to reclaim your manhood. Think about it. That's just $0.96 a day for an entire year, less than the price of a Coke and bag of blubber-inducing chips.
    There are no wrong threats, only wrong answers. (Strategy game truism)
  2. Paul Genge is offline

    Registered Member

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    Mar 2005
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    44

    Posted On:
    12/16/2005 4:01am


     Style: Systema

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Oh dear............
  3. elipson is offline
    elipson's Avatar

    Ad Hominem rocks.

    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    BC, Canada
    Posts
    3,478

    Posted On:
    12/16/2005 4:03am

    supporting member
     Style: BJJ, mma

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Ahahahahahahaha!!!! 350!!!! ahahaha!!

    Anyone stupid enough to pay for that deserves what they get!
  4. black mamba is offline

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    Mar 2005
    Posts
    48

    Posted On:
    12/16/2005 9:01am


     Style: wsl

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Guys dont take it too seriously its just marketing
  5. PEtrainer is offline

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    Nov 2005
    Posts
    320

    Posted On:
    12/16/2005 9:05am


     Style: wrestling, Bjj, fi ting

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Wow... As someone who has deadicated his free time and half of his professional life (for the last 15 years) to human stregenth training, this just floors me.

    Primates have totally different joints and muscle bellys. They are 10x overbuilt compared to ours. Their ligaments and tendons would be like comparing nylon rope to dental floss.

    What an ass.
  6. Shawarma is online now

    Senior Member

    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Posts
    2,481

    Posted On:
    12/16/2005 9:07am


     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Primate Power? He's really sunk low, hasn't he? I wonder what'll be next. 'Tard strength training programs? Prison Rape Conditioning? Combat Masturbation?

    What's the URL for his terrorist defense program anyway? I seem to recall he was peddling one.
  7. Shawarma is online now

    Senior Member

    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Posts
    2,481

    Posted On:
    12/16/2005 9:08am


     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I wonder if his next DVD series Primate Pugilism will teach you how to throw **** at potential agressors and climb trees to escape muggers.
  8. PirateJon is offline
    PirateJon's Avatar

    and good morning to you too

    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    DC
    Posts
    3,240

    Posted On:
    12/16/2005 9:27am

    supporting member
     Style: MT/BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Shawarma
    I wonder if his next DVD series Primate Pugilism will teach you how to throw **** at potential agressors and climb trees to escape muggers.

    It'd work too. Who's going to mug the guy in the loincloth flinging poo at a wall while masturbating?
    You can't make people smarter. You can expose them to information, but your responsibility stops there.
  9. Porrig is offline

    Registered Member

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    Jun 2005
    Location
    The Moon
    Posts
    91

    Posted On:
    12/16/2005 9:36am


     Style: Beatyerass

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    This is the fuckin' funniest thing I've seen in ages. Geez, what a flaccid knobend.
  10. Beatdown Richie is offline
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    game dog

    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Location
    Munich, Germany
    Posts
    1,886

    Posted On:
    12/16/2005 9:43am

    supporting member
     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I wonder what'll be next.
    The logical next step is to argue that elephants are actually even stronger than primates, and have no natural enemies.

    "Learn to become truly unbeatable through this innovative, never-seen-before set of exercises and nutrition plans that includes trotting through the savannah, mauling trees with your teeth and eating prodigious amounts of green leaf!"
    There are no wrong threats, only wrong answers. (Strategy game truism)
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