223524 Bullies, 4491 online  
  • Register
Our Sponsors:

Results 1 to 10 of 12
Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Sponsored Links Spacer Image
  1. DARKSON is offline
    DARKSON's Avatar

    Middleweight

    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Coral Springs, Florida
    Posts
    1,514

    Posted On:
    11/07/2005 7:14pm

    supporting member
     Style: Muay Thai & BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Facts you don't know about Chuck Norris!

    Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

    Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

    Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

    Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.

    A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is "Charles". Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded.

    Chuck Norris lives by only one rule: No Asian Chicks.

    Chuck Norris once tried to sue Burger King after they refused to put razor wire in his Whopper Jr., insisting that actually is "his" way.

    One day Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at McDonalds. When the employee asked him if he wanted fries with that, Chuck Norris had sex with his girlfriend, taped it, and mailed the tape to him for Christmas.

    When God kicked Adam and Eve out of the Garden, Chuck Norris stayed because God was too afraid to ask him to leave.

    Chuck Norris once claimed that Clear Pepsi "was for queers." The following day, Pepsi pulled the product from shelves.

    Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris is unable to send his roundhouse kicks across the fabric of time, however he IS able to perform this action across parallel dimensions and once, just for fun, roundhouse kicked his own ass.

    Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked an estimated 400,000 Viet Kong to death in 1985.

    Chuck Norris is ranked 12th in the AP college football poll.

    Chuck Norris doesn’t look at the toilet paper after he wipes.

    Scientology is Chuck Norris' first successful get-rich-quick scheme.

    The only reason World War II occurred was because Chuck Norris was taking a nap.

    Chuck Norris once smoked an entire pound of dank in one sitting. When his wife refused to make him an entire 5-course meal, he gave her swift roundhouse kick to the ovaries to fling her into outer space. He the celebrated afterwards by eating three hundred chocolate snacks packs.

    Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wise men, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.

    The original theme song to the Transformers was actually "Chuck Norris--more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris--robot in disguise," and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up. This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided.

    Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't **** with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.

    [i]Taken from mma.tv[\i]
    "The next one I will take will pay for my loss. Someone has to pay!" ~ The Axe Murderer
  2. CanucKyokushin is offline

    He'll flip ya!

    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    ?????????
    Posts
    2,736

    Posted On:
    11/07/2005 7:17pm

    supporting member
     Style: Not.....working

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Ha haha hahaha!Very funny!Oh wait a minute?This has already been posted.
  3. FighterJones is offline
    FighterJones's Avatar

    Registered User

    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Posts
    1,516

    Posted On:
    11/07/2005 7:19pm


     Style: LARPing

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Oh come on, pirates are SO much more cooler.
  4. DARKSON is offline
    DARKSON's Avatar

    Middleweight

    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Coral Springs, Florida
    Posts
    1,514

    Posted On:
    11/07/2005 7:27pm

    supporting member
     Style: Muay Thai & BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Oh damn, sorry.
    "The next one I will take will pay for my loss. Someone has to pay!" ~ The Axe Murderer
  5. supercrap is offline
    supercrap's Avatar

    Founder/GrandSensei of Joint British / Papua New Guinean Non-contact Lawn Bowls Jiu Jitsu Committee

    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Least Cool Guy in all of Japan
    Posts
    2,296

    Posted On:
    11/07/2005 8:20pm


     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Well I thought that was hilarious.

    I never knew that about Chuck. But I suspected.
    Imports from Japan, Shipping Worldwide! Art Junkie, Scramble, BJJ Spirits, Reversal...
    Scramble Stuff
  6. Locu5 is offline
    Locu5's Avatar

    Zombie Herald

    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Atlanta, GA
    Posts
    3,786

    Posted On:
    11/07/2005 8:24pm

    supporting member
     Style: Alliance BJJ (Blue)

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    You got a good chuckle. AM I RITE?1?
  7. Neildo is offline
    Neildo's Avatar

    Senior Member

    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Vancouver BC
    Posts
    6,045

    Posted On:
    11/07/2005 8:35pm

    Join us... or die
     Style: FBSD

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Just when i thought I'd seen 'em all...

    Top 5.

    #5 - "JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement."

    #4 - "Chuck Norris had sex with his girlfriend, taped it, and mailed the tape to him for Christmas. "

    #3 - "...and once, just for fun, roundhouse kicked his own ass."

    #2 - "Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths. "

    #1 - "...who defended the earth from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up. This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided."

    Made my day Darkson.
    Last edited by Neildo; 11/07/2005 8:37pm at .
  8. albert is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Posts
    932

    Posted On:
    11/07/2005 9:43pm


     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    These are originally from the Chuck Norris Fact generator: http://www.4q.cc/chuck/

    There's also generators for Mr. T and Vin Diesel on the same page.
  9. supercrap is offline
    supercrap's Avatar

    Founder/GrandSensei of Joint British / Papua New Guinean Non-contact Lawn Bowls Jiu Jitsu Committee

    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Least Cool Guy in all of Japan
    Posts
    2,296

    Posted On:
    11/07/2005 10:03pm


     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Somebody should do a Steven Seagal one.

    That would be awesome.
    Imports from Japan, Shipping Worldwide! Art Junkie, Scramble, BJJ Spirits, Reversal...
    Scramble Stuff
  10. odorblocker is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    147

    Posted On:
    11/07/2005 10:26pm


     Style: TKD

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    These facts would work better for Segal.
Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Powered by vBulletin™© contact@vbulletin.com vBulletin Solutions, Inc. 2011 All rights reserved.