The Man with No Neck
Posted On:2/16/2003 10:52pm
Style: submission wrestling
Hey guys, I was just browsing through a weblog (www.imao.us) and came across this little gem under the category "These things I believe":
Random Ninja Attacks
Nothing ruins a quiet stroll through the countryside quite like being jumped by a group of ninjas. Itís a common complaint, and the problem is only getting worse. Yet, the solutions offered are just more of the same. Build taller fences they say, but we all know how adept ninjas are at climbing. They propose putting more townspeople on ninja watch, but the whole point of a ninja is to sneak by unseen. Sometimes hiring wandering ronin to attack the ninjasí headquarters has worked as a temporary solution, but the ninjas always regroup and the ronin are expensive and not always trustworthy. Frankly, how good could a samurai be if his master is dead? I say the only real solution is to make the death touch available to the people. When the common man is able to cause someoneís heart to explode by striking certain pressure points, then they will be able to defend themselves from vicious ninjas. There are many who oppose this, but, when the death touch is outlawed, only outlaws will use the death touch. And that leaves no one safe
So, as you can see, the McDojo virus is spreading and slowly infecting every part of the web. Viva Bullshido!
"I had once talked to Billy Conn, the boxer, about professionals versus amateurs - specifically street fighters. One had always heard rumors of champions being taken out by back-alley fighters. Conn was scornful. "Aw, it's like hitting a girl," he said. "They're nothing."
- George Plimpton
Posted On:2/16/2003 11:37pm
lol. Who wrote this?!?!? A 12 year old??
the world you live in is just a sugar coated toping. beneath it is another world. The real world. and to survive there you must learn to pull the trigger!!!-Blade
Posted On:2/16/2003 11:39pm
Whoever wrote it was a genius.
Posted On:2/16/2003 11:42pm
Style: Thai Boxing
Lol, just like realultimatepower.net, just ignore it and it might go away. OR THE NINJAS JUST MIGHT FLIP OUT AND KILL YOU.
Remember the time in the 6th grade where you got your ass-kicked by that 80-pound short-kid? Got BJJ?
<marquee>Thai Boxing: Been kicking your ass since 1949.</marquee>
Posted On:2/17/2003 7:50pm
Man, you had better be careful.....Several Ninjas are lurking around on this board!!! I'd hate to be the one to get them stirred up. I heard about this one dude who pissed them off....They came at him through the CD-ROM drive...One of them used the cord on the mouse to choke the guy to death!!! After hearing that, I switched to a wireless mouse... You can never be too careful.
Such as thou art, sometime was I.
Posted On:2/17/2003 7:57pm
Style: Brazilian Jiujitsu
I don't belie.......ERK!
**The most miraculous power that can verifiably be attributed to "chi" is its ability to be all things to virtually all people, depending on what version of the superstition they are attempting to defend at any given moment.**
Normally, I'd say I was grappling, but I was taking down and mounting people, and JFS has kindly informed us that takedowns and being mounted are neither grappling nor anti grappling, so I'm not sure what the **** I was doing. Maybe schroedinger's sparring, where it's neither grappling nor anti-grappling until somoene observes it and collapses the waveform, and then I RNC a cat to death.----fatherdog
Posted On:2/17/2003 7:59pm
I have to find a link to a new grounds movie that was a manual on a ninja attack defense.
"A California man has been taken to court for stalking Anna Nicole Smith. The man has been charged with invasion of privacy, illegal trespassing, and having really bad taste."-Conan
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Damn!!! Sorry about that guys. Freaking Ninja got in through my scanner. He came alone, big mistake! I was able to smash his head repeatedly into my key board rendering him unconsious.
I warned you this could happen! You guys be careful.....
Posted On:2/17/2003 8:02pm
The ideal solution is to use watchdogs, since they can smell the ninjas hiding in the dark and keep them busy while you flush them out and skeet them; then you can serve them up with some great recipies; Ted Nugent has plenty. It's like he says, "before you grill it, ya gotta kill it!"
However since dogs are chiefly an entree on the McDojo drive-thru menu, unfortunately this isn't such a good solution in Japan.
Oh man!!! Looks like they got Wastrel...Hopefully he can take them....I went ahead and decapitated this one....It's the only way you can be sure they are dead....Remember, "They aren't dead 'till you seperate the head!"
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