Yeah, it's okay. My dad really only taught me the fundamentals, how to move, fall, and swing a big stick. heh heh. Was better than my friends dad...he's some kind of super Kung-fu nut, and just wailed on his kid. broke ribs n'****. My friend is pretty formidable, though i'm not condoning what his dad did.
Originally Posted by sidran
No no, i said EVEN, meaning that if they could ever possibly be proven false, which i doubt, his storytelling ability would blah blah blah, etcetera etcetera.
Originally Posted by miguksaram
I wish i lived closer to omega so he could school me in the way of getting into fights. Nobody EVER wants to fight me. Makes me wanna RETCH :XXpuke:
I think it's a good thing that you never got into fights. I haven't gotten into a fight since 5th grade and I am glad of it. If I ever did I would hope that I would be able to do what I needed to in order to get out of the situation, but if you ever get into a street fight it can turn bad real quick, and is not a situation I think anyone should want to be in.
The true test of a martial artist's skill is not whether or not he can win a fight. Instead it is whether or not he can shoot a chi ball from his scrotum.
You mean, you can't? Whoa, go see a doctor dude :toothy10:
Originally Posted by 9chambers
A shot of penicillin will clear up a case of the chi balls. :XXbunny:
Originally Posted by 9chambers
Jeremy M. Talbott
Originally Posted by Phrost
Originally Posted by D.Murray
Originally Posted by hangooknamja88
Send Omega a PM, then maybe we can get him talking again.
Did you guys read that post? There's your answer. He's a Mitty, through and through.
Originally Posted by Omega
Mr Politically Correct GIJoe6186:
Fat people disgust me in every way imaginable. I was at Freindly's with my girl tonight and saw a bunch of fat fuckers. I felt sorry for the pavement they were killing and the people who had to see them. .
Back by popular demand; :thefinger
I had to ask one of my guys to look over this thread and then see what story he'd think you guys might think was funny. Of course the dude was there for this one. He posted here once as JuxTheStampede so I'll be using that as his name on this story:
The three dumbfucks:
I was asked to do security for a frat house that I've done personal security for in the past. I've been doing this for a year using my fighters as bouncers and have never had a problem as I did an exibition fight for them the year before. Unfortunately this year many of the new guys had no idea who I was.
The president of the frat house asked JuxTheStampede to start clearing the top floor so that they could allow members only up top. As he was clearing the hallways I guess somebody gave him a hard time and he walked over to me and told me to escort the dude out. (JuxTheStampede is only 5'7" 140 but can handle himself we just don't want him doing so unless need be).
I walked over to the guy and said "okay dude let's go"
dumbfuck#1(5'10 170): what did I do?
Me: don't know don't care, you've been asked to leave you're not a member you're leaving.
dumbfuck#1 No **** this ****.
Me: You've got three second to start walking.
Dumbfuck#1: you can't touch me
Me: that's three seconds > I pick him up and start to carry him down and he grabs the corner wall.
Me: let go dude
Dumbfuck #1: **** you let me go......he flies down the stares and his head goes through the dry wall at the bottom.
I fly jump down there, and make sure he's okay. He looks fine and is conscious.
Me: You okay dude?
Dumbfuck#1: Yeah *groggy
I grab his foot and drag him down stairs, across the parking lot about 15 yards to the gate where uniformed security was waiting.
Me: he doesn't come back in.
I go back up stares and JuxTheStampede tell me the entire floor needs to be clear and that his other friends are starting trouble as he points to another guy *dumbfuck #2 (6' 185~)
Me: OKAY EVERYBODY OUT THE BACK STARES IF YOU DON'T HAVE A WRIST BAND GO DOWN STARES AND GET ONE AND WE'LL START MOVING EVERYBODY WITH ONE BACK UP.
Dumbfuck #2: dude you can't do that to people.
Me: I just did let's go down the stares.
He goes to push me and I slam him up against the wall and throw him in a single arm RNC. I start to walk him out the back when someones voice yells out "hey that's not right."
I think about it for a second, slam him up against the wall again and do a single arm kimura with the RNC. "Thanks you're right this is better"
I walk him to the back stairs which are longer and made of cement. I wisper in his ear :
Me: "Who's in control here"
dumbfuck#2 : you
Me: start walking down the fucking stairs or I'll throw you down
dumbfuck #2: it hurts man
Me: *crank-I'll make it hurt this much more if you don't start walking
other bouncer: dude start walking man
dumbfuck #2: don't hurt me
Me: start walking
He starts walking down the stairs slowly
Me: As you can see I'm starting to let go, if you struggle even a little bit you're going down these stairs hard.
dumbfuck#2: no problem
Me: good boy, next time someobody tells you to do something do it and don't talk tough after I let you go it'll only make you look stupid.
After he walks off I march up stairs with a super pissed off look on my face. Everybody gives me a wide birth except for.....
Dumbfuck #3(6'2" 240): I'd love to see you do that to me you d*........
I slam him up against the wall and throw him down the original set of stairs and fly down with him landing my knees on his ribs and face. I reach down and start tearing at his ear pushing his face down the carpeted second set of stairs (yes I put another whole in the wall). When we get to the bottom, I kick his ass literally so he fall back on his face as he was trying to get up. I tell the other 2 bouncers to make sure he gets to the gate I have something to take care of.
Me to the crowd upstairs: ARE THERE ANYMORE DUMBFUCKS THAT WANT TO START A FIGHT TONIGHT THIS **** IS GETTING TIRESOME!?!?!? NOW IF YOU DON'T HAVE A WRIST BAND GO DOWN STAIRS AND GET ONE!!!!!
Quickest moving group I've ever had.
JuxTheStampede: you okay dude?
Me: What the **** was that all about!!??!??!?
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