Seeker of Truth
Posted On:10/30/2004 3:49am
Style: Five Animal Fighting
Like the title says, I had a rank test tonight. My last one before testing for black belt. I had planned to take off work early so I could get home, get something to get, relax a little bit, then get to the test early so I had plenty of time to warm up. Things didn't quite work that way.
I had a report due at work by close of business today, and it took a lot longer than I thought it would. So I'm still at work at 6:00 pm, with my test starting at 7:30, my house on one side of town, my dojo on the other, and by work smack dab in the middle. I tell the other guy working on the report that I have the leave, head out the door, and fight traffic all the way home. So much for eating, relaxing, and getting there early. I barely had time to throw my gi on, and run right back out the door.
I get there just in time to register, hand my camcorder to by sister and brother-in-law who were kind enough to show up and tape for me, and head out onto the mat. I knew early on I was in trouble. Even after a few simple combinations I was getting winded and my techniques started feeling sluggish and sloppy. By the end of the basic fundamental portion I felt I was going to pass out.
After a brief rest we moved on to the self-defense portion, and things didn't get any better. I felt my timing was way off, I felt off balance and out of control, it was like my mind knew what I wanted to do by my body refused to do it. The test ended with a kata segment, and I felt like I couldn't even do that right. My legs were shaking, I couldn't hit my stances, my hands seemed to be encased in cement, and my strikes had nothing resembling power or intensity.
After I bowed out, I left the floor disgusted and dejected. I walked over to my brother-in-law and told him this was one of the worst performances I ever had. I was so pissed because I've been training so hard for the past 4 months. You see, there's normally about a year from the time someone gets to the rank right before black until they test for their black belt. There is a "pretest" about halfway through to check your progress. The next chance to pretest is December 18 and I'm going to give it a try then. So instead of 6 months time between by last rank test and my pretest, there's going to be about 6 weeks. That's why I stepped up my training 4 months ago to make sure I would be ready.
So the black belt running my group steps over to me, with my score sheet in hand, and I'm preparing myself for the list of all my mistakes and a lecture on how an effort like that just isn't going to cut it. What she says next is my worst fear, she says I've failed my test and I won't be allowed to pretest in December. I'm in total shock, I don't know what to say, too out of it to notice she has smile on her face. She hands me my score card and there's very little written on it. No comments, no mistakes, just perfect scores in every category.
I tell her she's crazy. I tell her how bad I felt about this test, how I felt I just didn't have it tonight, and can't see how I got perfect scores. I talk to the head instructor of the school about it, and he says he agrees with the scores. He says they don't mean I was pefect, only that I was achieving a significantly higher level of skill than what the rank I was testing for signifies, which is really how it should be since I'm supposed "halfway to black belt" in little over a month. He feels spending the last 4 months preparing for the pretest has probably raised my personal standards to unrealistic levels.
When I got home to watch the tape, I have to admit I looked pretty good. I still saw some mistakes, and a lot of stuff I want to do better, but it wasn't anywhere near as bad I thought it would be. Things that I thought of as big mess ups during the test were barely noticable, in fact the stuff I thought I fucked up the most seemed to be the stuff I did the best on. It's funny how your own mind can play tricks on you and give you a distorted view of reality.
Posted On:10/30/2004 4:33am
I suggest rejecting the rank test and doing it over again! :D
Oh by the way, after you get black again, are you going to go back to white and do it again? Third time's the charm they say!
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Posted On:10/30/2004 9:37am
Style: Knife-jitsu o=]==>
Congrats! Good luck on the pre-test :)
Shogun of Long Island
Posted On:10/30/2004 9:39am
rank tests are artificial things anyway if the instructor is already familiar with your skills
wants jade ring
Posted On:10/30/2004 9:52am
Style: kung fu
But isn't everything artificial, Jenfucious? Just a construct of our own delusional mindlessness? WTFBBQ?
Good job Punisher. Sounds like you definitely earned it.
Posted On:10/30/2004 9:57am
Style: San shou(tai chi) +judo
WTFBBQ= what the **** barbeque?
Originally Posted by Stickx
It must suck for legit practitioners of tai chi like Cullion to see their art get all watered down into exercise for seniors.
Those who esteme qi have no strength. ~ Exposition of Insights into the Thirteen Postures Attrib: Wu Yuxiang founder of Wu style tai chi.
Posted On:10/30/2004 10:38am
Style: Muay Thai, Kenjutsu
Good job! Your technique, but more importantly your attitude, showed that you're ready to move on towards the next level.
Posted On:10/30/2004 10:50am
Style: Hsing-I, Taiji
500 pushups before your next test will help you relax and feel better about yourself!
Posted On:10/30/2004 11:51am
...and help you fall over before you get to the mat
Posted On:10/30/2004 1:42pm
What? No endurance rounds?
"Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities." – Voltaire.
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