A SHINING example of kung fu BULLSHIdo (warning: long)

**manchuria** · Posted On: 6/21/2004 5:26am

norris versus tyson would be interesting, dont forget good ol chuck has a brown belt under the machados

**chaosexmachina** · Posted On: 6/21/2004 5:47am

Damn that Norris! Trying to unbullshido himself... One less to make fun of.

**bowers** · Posted On: 7/02/2005 3:45pm

:guitar: Cool

**Anna Kovacs** · Posted On: 7/02/2005 4:50pm

Your Dad is a smart man.

Originally Posted by EternalRage

I had a similar conversation with my dad once. Except the roles were flipped. I was a martial arts n00b at the time, taking TKD. I was fascinated by kung fu, especially the animal styles. My dad and I were watching a Hong Kong kung fu flick, and this is what we said:

Dad: Hows TKD
Me: Its OK. I would rather be learning kung fu.
Dad: I took TKD in Korea. That was OK. Stupid Americans can't teach TKD though.
Me: Should I quit?
Dad: What would you want to do instead?
Me: Animal Kung Fu
<Dad cracks up alot>
Me: What?
Dad: You're going to get killed someday if you tried to use that garbage.
Me: OK OK maybe some of the animals like crane or monkey won't work. Maybe the tiger?
Dad: You really think a bunch of people pretending to be animals can fight?
Me: I have a friend who does it and its really cool.
Dad: I used to get piss drunk with my friends in college. We would try and beat the **** out of each other. I learned more from that than any stupid martial arts class.
Me: I'll get the whisky...

Months Later when my dad comes to watch one of my TKD belt tests -
<At the break>
Dad: Why are there so many kids testing...
Me: I dunno
Dad: This is a carnival. A stupid circus. Thanks for wasting my Saturday. Told you these Americans couldn't teach TKD. So many kids...
<Walks out>

**Stick** · Posted On: 7/02/2005 5:31pm

**PoleFighter** · Posted On: 7/02/2005 6:35pm

Me, mom and dad:

DAD: so how's karate going?
ME: It's Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. It's very different from karate
DAD: Ok, whatever. You get one of those cute little outfitts though, don't you?
MOM: It's not small, it takes up the whole washing machine!
ME: ...

**Anna Kovacs** · Posted On: 7/02/2005 6:59pm

Originally Posted by PoleFighter

Me, mom and dad:

DAD: so how's karate going?
ME: It's Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. It's very different from karate
DAD: Ok, whatever. You get one of those cute little outfitts though, don't you?
MOM: It's not small, it takes up the whole washing machine!
ME: ...

My little sister calls every thing that looks like a martial art "karate". it's kind of cute.

Even boxing is "karate"

**Poop Loops** · Posted On: 7/02/2005 9:28pm

"How's your Karate going?"
"...You mean tennis...?"
"Oh whatever."

PL

**meng_mao** · Posted On: 7/03/2005 3:06am

Originally Posted by CrashStitches

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't the heart kinda soft? Even if you managed to rip up and under the ribcage, find the heart, and get a solid grip on it, you'd still have to grab it with sufficient force to tear it away from the moorings. I think you'd be more likely to squash it than rip it out. You'd pull back a handful of ragged chunks and be highly disappointed.

And you'd stink.

Aim for something more readily acessible! Rip out your opponent's BLADDER! Or better yet, get his prostate!

Ever held a beef heart at the grocery store? It's
pretty tough, solid muscle. I think if you got your
hand around it, it would come out in one piece.