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  1. #91

    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    218
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I love how they are constantly probing you to find out your net worth, instructor have nothing to do with the tuition fees...my ass.

  2. #92

    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    Mountain
    Posts
    908
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    "So he showed me how a defense from someone attacking me with a pipe was hidden in the kata,"

    Hmmm... Why "hide" techniques in kata? I'd rather someone teach basic principles that you can apply to various situations.


    "Mr. X also explained that the throat and carotid strikes he had just taught me were extremely deadly"

    Wow! He "taught" you throat and carotid strikes that quickly? Hmmm... Maybe you shouldn't write this instructor off so quickly, Bunyip. He must be a great instructor to be able to teach someone something so L3th4L after showing someone a form one time. :D

  3. #93

    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    Mountain
    Posts
    908
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    "if his sensei ever needed him at 2 am, he'd be there for him no matter what, and vice versa, and he hoped we'd have that same relationship someday"

    Hmmmm... Riiiiight.


    "defenses against haymakers, which no one actually throws. He was a boxer, so he knew that punches are usually much tighter..."

    Oh, cool! So, if you ever have to fight a boxer, you're set! If you fight some bum on the street, though, I think you're screwed. ;)


    "with your opponent on the 12, your toes point toward the 3. Your chest also faces the 3"

    Ummm... So, what do you do if your opponent shifts around to your 9? Time for a kidney shot!


    ""sport" oriented schools teach you to kick with the top of your foot, whereas they teach to strike with the ball, which is more powerful and gives you longer range."

    Man, if feel sorry for those poor MT SOB's. They need to learn a thing or two about power kicks. ;)


    "Invite them over to stay over at your house for the weekend. EVERY lesson.
    Follow them around after class. Scratch uncontrollably when they notice you..." -- Elfin Vampire

    Man, that was some of the weirdest **** I've read in a long time... Welcome to Bullshido!! :D

  4. #94

    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Central Florida
    Posts
    217
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    BTW, thanks for new sig material.

  5. #95
    WhiteShark's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Atlanta GA
    Posts
    9,167
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I can tell one thing from all of this they don't kick to the leg when sparring!

  6. #96
    bunyip's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Berkeley, CA
    Posts
    1,072
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I had my third class today. The goal of this class was to prepare me for my white belt test, which will occur at my next lesson. All the head instructors from the local schools, along with the head of the system, will come to observe this test. Mr. X made sure to impress on me how important these guys are and how I must be sure not to waste their time. I'm actually starting to feel a little guilty about this – I can't imagine how someone new to the McDojo scene would deal with it.

    The recruiting has been quite impressive. Since my first visit, there has been a concerted effort to schedule my private lessons on consecutive days. I've never been given an opportunity to "go home and think about it", as I have been at every BJJ school I've tried. Now, all of a sudden, the top instructors in the system, whose time is "extremely valuable" will be showing up to grade my final lesson. If my performance is acceptable, the top instructor (Mr. K) will drive me, in his car, to the Center of Records and Enrollment where we will figure out the payment schedule. Mr. X told me to be sure to bring my schedule and an idea of how much I could afford, along with a check so that I could put down a down payment to prove my commitment. And although he has nothing to do with the financial side, Mr. X also managed to work into the conversation some more questions about my career goals and whether my parents were supporting me. Also, since my parents live together, I only listed my mother as my emergency contact, so Mr. X wanted to double check that my dad was still in the picture.

    Most of today's lesson was review, to prepare me for the white belt test. I also learned how to kneel properly, and the proper etiquette for receiving my white belt. This took about 30 minutes. (Interesting fact: students wear their belt knots on the side, while instructors wear their knots in front. I think Mr. X said that this shows that the instructors are always ready for a challenge…)

    I did learn a couple new moves today. There was the "back kick", or "horse kick". I chamber my right hand high in my armpit, then grip my right shoulder with my left hand. I bend forward at the waist and kick back with my right heel, striking the opponent in the solar plexus (or the shin, for someone of my flexibility). The gem of this technique was Mr. X explaining that I had to leave the kick extended long enough for "all of the energy to transfer to my opponent". Since we must always overtrain, that meant I had to kick my leg back, leave it extended for one second, and then retract it.

    I also learned the "defense from kimono grab", which went like this: My opponent (who is presumably Frankenstein) rushes at me, arms extended, to push on my shoulders. As Frankenstein is right handed, there will probably be more force from his right hand, so I use his energy to pivot 90 degrees to my left into a low horse stance. My left hand pins his left hand to my right shoulder as I simultaneously execute an upward block with my right hand, causing a compound fracture in his arm. Next, I drag my arm back down his arm, catching the bones which are now protruding through the skin and ripping them free. This motion also jerks his arm forward, causing his head to snap backwards from the whiplash. I karate chop his throat (we had covered the karate chop earlier this lesson), killing him, because it only takes "3 pounds of force to damage the trachea and 5 pounds of force to permanently close it".

    We also covered eye gouges, just briefly. Mr. X told me that most of the school's techniques take years to perfect, but eye gouges are nice and straightforward. If I was only going to be training for a few months, he'd teach me some eye gouges and send me on my way. And just in case any of you with glasses are feeling confident, be assured that they're no impediment: we just attack with a downward tiger claw hand – the thumb and pinky remove the glasses as the other three fingers tear into the eyes.

    Next lesson: white belt test and my trip to C.O.R.E.!
    "I'm offering straight punch, kick while downed to the ribs or head, and of course- the german suplex...which is one suplex quickly followed by another." - Guerilla Fists

    Matt Thornton explains "aliveness": http://www.bullshido.com/videos/sbg2.wmv

    West Wind Karate / West Wind Bok Fu / West Wind Kung Fu thread
    West Wind Karate / West Wind Bok Fu / West Wind Kung Fu archive thread
    (experiment to see if I can boost the thread's Google rank)


  7. #97
    alex's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    New Zealand
    Posts
    8,202
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    i just cant stop laughing

  8. #98

    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    3,530
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    ....into a low horse stance.
    Welll, if there's a more stable position, I'd like to hear it!!@

    Stable...get it? Horse...

  9. #99

    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    NW Arkansas
    Posts
    2,525
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    argghh, can't stop reading...

  10. #100
    WingChun Lawyer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    São Paulo, Brazil
    Posts
    5,426
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    The pain...
    That civilisation may not sink,
    Its great battle lost,
    Quiet the dog, tether the pony
    To a distant post;
    Our master Caesar is in the tent
    Where the maps are spread,
    His eyes fixed upon nothing,
    A hand under his head.


    - W.B. Yeats

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