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  1. #21

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by BackFistMonkey View Post
    I am actually expecting a TL;DR or a Trump Style 9 bullet point per page summary.

    ... and good luck. It read to me like the genealogy sections of the Old Testament my mind just kept sliding off the data. I can't do it.
    It might take a while I need to take a break for a minute.

  2. #22

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Ok guys here it is. This was possibly the worst **** I have ever read; the English was atrocious, there are two citations in the whole thing, one of which is Black belt Magazine and the other is the Tae Kwon Do Times which I didn't even know existed, several paragraphs are repeated exactly multiple times and the whole thing is just insane.

    To the OP: God fucking damn you. I'll see you in hell with Henry Kissinger and Madeleine Albright. **** you for making me read that shite.

    With that out of the way:

    TL;DR:

    Hapkido was (according to OP, I'm not going to summarise AND fact check this bollocks) founded by Choi Yong Sul after he was adopted by a "samurai monk" as a child. He sent his students round the world to spread Hapkido; he sends a man called Chinil Chang to the USA. Chang doesn't want to actually do any work spreading Hapkido, but he does want to be successor to the Hapkido Empire so he sends Choi Yong Sul "monetary funds" (I kept thinking of the IMF whenever I read this) from the States in return for belt promotions with the goal of being the first to get 10th Dan and thus be named successor to Choi. Chang's "devil like attitude" is mentioned countless fucking times; he goes around claiming to be able to do all kinds of stuff including incline bench 6 plates.
    In 1975 Chang performs a demo in NY during which he accidentally throws a spike into a student's neck then tries to play it off like nothing happens (apparently this was the cover issue of Black Belt Magazine, December 1975, under the headline "ARE DEMOS DEADLY?"), but Choi doesn't hear about this and continues mailing him belts.
    In the 80s Chang becomes 9th dan but hears that Choi is going to name a guy called Mike Wollmershauser as Hapkido ambassador to America or some **** and Chang wants the position for himself, so he acts as a translator in an interview with Choi, says Choi made him his successor and steals the interview tapes so no one can prove that Mike is the rightful US Father of Hapkido (it's so fucking hard to keep track of the titles so I just didn't bother). When OP speaks out about this (the OP talks about himself in the third person a lot) he gets demoted to white belt.
    Chang is allegedly a dick to his students, kicking a kid out of anger, taking creepy photos of a teenage girl in a leotard and kicking OP full in the balls for no particular reason. OP explains his insane loyalty to this guy over a period of decades by saying he was just sticking around to gather evidence of Chang's fuckery.
    During the 80s Chang's rivals, Choi's other senior students, are climbing the belt ladder rapidly so Chang needs to hurry the **** up and get named successor. He continues to pay Choi cash and in 1985 is named 10th Dan Successor (in the same year he hits a kid for bringing a copy of the aforementioned Black Belt issue to class).
    In 1989 Mike Wollmershauser writes an article for TKD Times about how Chang fucked him over; by 1991 word has gotten round that Chang is a conman so he decides to befriend the guy with the goal of getting him to retract the article, which he does in 1992. In return, Chang promises to release the stolen tapes that show he is the rightful American Hapkido Dim Mak Daddy or whatever, but tells OP he has no intention of doing so.
    In 1993 Chang gets into beef with his landlord over utilities costs for his Dojang; the landlord cuts off his power but OP helps him fix it for some reason. He gets kicked out and finds a new location which OP renovates for him, for free, by himself, sleeping on the mats when he gets tired, despite claiming to already know the guy was a fraud; in return Chang takes his black belt away again.
    By 1995 OP is basically running his class. Chang files a fraudulent lawsuit against the owner of a restaurant on the floor above his dojang which he loses, then blames OP for not lying in court for him.
    In 1998 Chang gets evicted again and starts "teaching" (i.e. giving long lectures about how the US and Japan suck, how he can incline bench 6 plates, religion etc) in a park until he starts beef with some local people who bring their mates along and tell him to **** off (there's a section which is literally repeated word for word several times in the text about this, it happens like 3 times).
    In 2002 Chang promotes OP to black belt for the 3rd time.
    Sometime after 2007 OP convinces Chang to prove his claim that he can incline bench 6 plates; he drops the barbell on his head, which apparently only leads to minor injuries requiring stitches.
    Chang's lessons get even more speech-oriented; if it gets too cold he takes his students into MacDonald's to continue his lectures
    In 2012 he gets kicked out of another park; this time some local MA teachers also turn up and start training there to see if he will challenge them to leave, which, being a punk bitch, he doesn't.
    In 2013 he gets himself kicked out of another park by the locals
    In 2015 when this happens AGAIN OP finally decides it's time to leave; the main thing he seems to be angry about, bizarrely, is the fact that Chang never gave him any belt certificates. I **** you not he says this several times

    There's your TL;DR. It genuinely took a couple hours to get through this crap.

    Once again: God damn you to hell, OP.

  3. #23
    DCS's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Mandem View Post
    Hapkido was (according to OP, I'm not going to summarise AND fact check this bollocks) founded by Choi Yong Sul after he was adopted by a "samurai monk" as a child.
    Interestingly OP's version doesn't match with own Choi's story of his childhood and training in Japan. See Black Belt Magazine, June 1999 issue.

  4. #24

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by DCS View Post
    Interestingly OP's version doesn't match with own Choi's story of his childhood and training in Japan. See Black Belt Magazine, June 1999 issue.
    "Interestingly" in this case meaning "completely predictably"

  5. #25
    ermghoti's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Mandem View Post
    Ok guys here it is. This was possibly the worst **** I have ever read; the English was atrocious, there are two citations in the whole thing, one of which is Black belt Magazine and the other is the Tae Kwon Do Times which I didn't even know existed, several paragraphs are repeated exactly multiple times and the whole thing is just insane.

    To the OP: God fucking damn you. I'll see you in hell with Henry Kissinger and Madeleine Albright. **** you for making me read that shite.

    With that out of the way:

    TL;DR:

    Hapkido was (according to OP, I'm not going to summarise AND fact check this bollocks) founded by Choi Yong Sul after he was adopted by a "samurai monk" as a child. He sent his students round the world to spread Hapkido; he sends a man called Chinil Chang to the USA. Chang doesn't want to actually do any work spreading Hapkido, but he does want to be successor to the Hapkido Empire so he sends Choi Yong Sul "monetary funds" (I kept thinking of the IMF whenever I read this) from the States in return for belt promotions with the goal of being the first to get 10th Dan and thus be named successor to Choi. Chang's "devil like attitude" is mentioned countless fucking times; he goes around claiming to be able to do all kinds of stuff including incline bench 6 plates.
    In 1975 Chang performs a demo in NY during which he accidentally throws a spike into a student's neck then tries to play it off like nothing happens (apparently this was the cover issue of Black Belt Magazine, December 1975, under the headline "ARE DEMOS DEADLY?"), but Choi doesn't hear about this and continues mailing him belts.
    In the 80s Chang becomes 9th dan but hears that Choi is going to name a guy called Mike Wollmershauser as Hapkido ambassador to America or some **** and Chang wants the position for himself, so he acts as a translator in an interview with Choi, says Choi made him his successor and steals the interview tapes so no one can prove that Mike is the rightful US Father of Hapkido (it's so fucking hard to keep track of the titles so I just didn't bother). When OP speaks out about this (the OP talks about himself in the third person a lot) he gets demoted to white belt.
    Chang is allegedly a dick to his students, kicking a kid out of anger, taking creepy photos of a teenage girl in a leotard and kicking OP full in the balls for no particular reason. OP explains his insane loyalty to this guy over a period of decades by saying he was just sticking around to gather evidence of Chang's fuckery.
    During the 80s Chang's rivals, Choi's other senior students, are climbing the belt ladder rapidly so Chang needs to hurry the **** up and get named successor. He continues to pay Choi cash and in 1985 is named 10th Dan Successor (in the same year he hits a kid for bringing a copy of the aforementioned Black Belt issue to class).
    In 1989 Mike Wollmershauser writes an article for TKD Times about how Chang fucked him over; by 1991 word has gotten round that Chang is a conman so he decides to befriend the guy with the goal of getting him to retract the article, which he does in 1992. In return, Chang promises to release the stolen tapes that show he is the rightful American Hapkido Dim Mak Daddy or whatever, but tells OP he has no intention of doing so.
    In 1993 Chang gets into beef with his landlord over utilities costs for his Dojang; the landlord cuts off his power but OP helps him fix it for some reason. He gets kicked out and finds a new location which OP renovates for him, for free, by himself, sleeping on the mats when he gets tired, despite claiming to already know the guy was a fraud; in return Chang takes his black belt away again.
    By 1995 OP is basically running his class. Chang files a fraudulent lawsuit against the owner of a restaurant on the floor above his dojang which he loses, then blames OP for not lying in court for him.
    In 1998 Chang gets evicted again and starts "teaching" (i.e. giving long lectures about how the US and Japan suck, how he can incline bench 6 plates, religion etc) in a park until he starts beef with some local people who bring their mates along and tell him to **** off (there's a section which is literally repeated word for word several times in the text about this, it happens like 3 times).
    In 2002 Chang promotes OP to black belt for the 3rd time.
    Sometime after 2007 OP convinces Chang to prove his claim that he can incline bench 6 plates; he drops the barbell on his head, which apparently only leads to minor injuries requiring stitches.
    Chang's lessons get even more speech-oriented; if it gets too cold he takes his students into MacDonald's to continue his lectures
    In 2012 he gets kicked out of another park; this time some local MA teachers also turn up and start training there to see if he will challenge them to leave, which, being a punk bitch, he doesn't.
    In 2013 he gets himself kicked out of another park by the locals
    In 2015 when this happens AGAIN OP finally decides it's time to leave; the main thing he seems to be angry about, bizarrely, is the fact that Chang never gave him any belt certificates. I **** you not he says this several times

    There's your TL;DR. It genuinely took a couple hours to get through this crap.

    Once again: God damn you to hell, OP.
    tl;dr hapkido is for pussies.
    "Systema, which means, 'the system'..."

    Quote Originally Posted by strikistanian View Post
    DROP SEIONAGI ************! Except I don't know Judo, so it doesn't work, and he takes my back.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil
    Why is it so goddamn hard to find a video of it? I've seen videos I'm pretty sure are alien spacecraft. But still no good Krav.
    Quote Originally Posted by Plasma
    At the point, I must act! You see my rashguard saids "Jiu Jitsu vs The World" and "The World" was standing in front me teaching Anti-Grappling in a school I help run.
    [quote=SoulMechanic]Thank you, not dying really rewarding in more ways than I can express.[/[quote]

  6. #26

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Mandem - if you are ever in the St. Louis area, drinks are on me. You earned it.

  7. #27
    DCS's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Mandem View Post
    "Interestingly" in this case meaning "completely predictably"
    Yes.

    OTOH this:

    In 1975 Chang performs a demo in NY during which he accidentally throws a spike into a student's neck then tries to play it off like nothing happens (apparently this was the cover issue of Black Belt Magazine, December 1975, under the headline "ARE DEMOS DEADLY?")
    Is accurate.

  8. #28

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by GrouchyOldMan View Post
    Mandem - if you are ever in the St. Louis area, drinks are on me. You earned it.
    I'm gonna remember this if I ever go to the States. Cheers.

  9. #29

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by DCS View Post
    Yes.

    OTOH this:


    Is accurate.
    Seriously? LMAO
    The real issue with this post (content wise) is OP's supposed 40 years of loyalty to this guy, including renovating his gym for free and fixing his electricity.

  10. #30

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Now I need some fresh air.

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