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  1. MrMcFu is offline

    Badness will not be rewarded

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    Apr 2003
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    Montreal, Canada
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    Posted On:
    9/12/2003 11:57pm

    supporting member
     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    SLJ's topic on Ashida Kim's flowering kiddie porn empire reminded me of s story that needs sharing with all of Bullshido . . .


    In college, I had a friend who we will call Jack. Jack was a cool guy and had done WT for a long time, but had stopped once he moved to go to school. Looking for an MA to start, he met this guy named Robert who said he was an "Akido Master". Now I don't know crap about Akido, but I knew it involved wrist locks, falls, and meditation. At the time I was doing TKD and thought I was invincible, so I declined his offer to train with them.

    Fast forward a few months . . .

    I ran into Jack at a party and asked how he liked his Akido. He just took a big swig of his drink, then turned very pale and stared at me. I was getting a bit uncomfortable, since I thought we were tight and the feeling I had somehow pissed him off. Finally he just told me to follow him out on the balcony so we could talk.

    It turns out his first month of "Akido" was nothing but meditation in a dark room with burning incense . Master Robert said they needed it to prepare for the physically demanding tasks ahead. After "class" one day, Jack asked Robert when they were going to do the martial part.

    Jack then stopped his story and looked like he was about to puke. I was like, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to man." But no, he wanted to finish. It seems Robert told him in order to take the next step in his training, they would need to shower naked together. But that was okay, since shortly thereafter they would take a trip to the moons of Jupiter together and all would be revealed.

    Needless to say, that was Jack's last day under Robert's "instruction". He had that not-so-fresh-feeling for a few months afterward, and ran away whenever he saw Robert on campus.

    Robert kept going to that university long after Jack and I left. At one point the Akido master caught up to me in a class we shared, and started to talk about martial arts (somehow he knew I did BJJ at that point). He told me about the "devastating offensive" capabilities of Akido and how it also involved swords. Particuarly HIS sword I imagine. Anyway, I turned down his enthusiastic invites and he eventually went away.

    As an endnote, let me just say I have nothing against Akido. I have never tried it. But I don't think it involves swords or taking naked showers or going to the moons of Jupiter.

    -------------

    UPDATE - from 9-18-2003 post

    I just showed this page to Jack's old girlfriend, and she told me there was a couple of things that Jack didn't share with me.

    1. The students actually medidated naked.

    2. They also cleaned Roberts house naked as well.

    Now I can see why Jack got so upset. He obviously had sexual issues of his own in order to progress this far in Robert's "Akido program".
    Last edited by MrMcFu; 1/13/2005 3:56am at . Reason: Include newer post update info in first post-
  2. PizDoff is offline

    .

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    Feb 2003
    Location
    Toronto
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    Posted On:
    9/14/2003 1:32pm

    supporting memberstaff
     Style: Grappling

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Akido is from Jupiter?

    --
    Hard Work, Patience, Dedication
    Fighting Multiples - http://bullshido.com/article_read.asp?id=162

    "Okay Mr. Mcfu I've got to ask.....what kind of bullshit technique is that one in your sig?" Posted by omega.
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  3. Aikiwriter is offline

    Registered Member

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    Aug 2003
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    Posted On:
    9/14/2003 6:15pm


     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    No. Akido is from Mars, Aikido is from Venus.

    ;)
  4. manchuria is offline

    lord of the glen

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    Sep 2003
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    deep in the mountains
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    2,165

    Posted On:
    9/14/2003 9:39pm

    supporting member
     Style: Kung Fu

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    i took an aikido class, just a lot of arm locks an stuff (mind you i wouldnt have minded a trip to jupiter with one of the ladies there...)

    seriously tho, that is a scary story, i will have to keep it away from ppl who i am trying to get into martial arts...
    CLICK THE ADDS ROMO!

    This chapter will also show clips from a high-speed video in which Master Bristol conceals a Swiss Army Knife inside his buttocks. -from "The Magicians Code" by Hans Bristol
  5. Akuma is offline

    Registered Member

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    Jul 2003
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    327

    Posted On:
    9/15/2003 5:00am


     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I don't get it? Why didn't Jack "jack Off" Robert?
  6. MrMcFu is offline

    Badness will not be rewarded

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    Posted On:
    9/15/2003 5:12am

    supporting member
     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Because he wanted to save that part for you Akuma :)
  7. SLJ is offline

    Titan

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    UK
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    Posted On:
    9/15/2003 5:13am

    supporting member
     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    >I turned down his enthusiastic invites and he eventually went away.



    LOL, I'm glad to see you've changed the wording slightly MrMcfu, much better. <img src=icon_smile.gif border=0 align=middle>

    And I find it strange that everyone's art suddenly becomes, "devastating" once they find out you do BJJ.

    Must be all those subs, sweeps and escapes "hidden" in the katas.

    -----------------------------------------------------------
    "Oh you bastard, I fucking hate pikeys!" - Georgeous George
    "You realise the transformations give a man enough strength to destroy a truck with his bare hands!?
    YOU HAVE BETRAYED ME, IN THE WORST POSSIBLE MANNER!!" - KiWarrior

    "Sport ? That kind of thing's not my bag baby!" - Sammy Franco

    "This system was developed with the help of notible BJJ fighter Ribbon Muchado." - "Sifu" Anthony Iglesias
  8. MrMcFu is offline

    Badness will not be rewarded

    Join Date
    Apr 2003
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    Posted On:
    9/15/2003 5:20am

    supporting member
     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Thank God they took those out.

    Think of the children.
  9. SLJ is offline

    Titan

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    Posted On:
    9/15/2003 5:34am

    supporting member
     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Oh of course, heavens we don't want them learning anything usefull.

    Just have them punch and kick the air for 45 minutes, then convince them that 30 is a fair price for piece of coloured cloth.<img src=icon_smile.gif border=0 align=middle>

    -----------------------------------------------------------
    "Oh you bastard, I fucking hate pikeys!" - Georgeous George
    "You realise the transformations give a man enough strength to destroy a truck with his bare hands!?
    YOU HAVE BETRAYED ME, IN THE WORST POSSIBLE MANNER!!" - KiWarrior

    "Sport ? That kind of thing's not my bag baby!" - Sammy Franco

    "This system was developed with the help of notible BJJ fighter Ribbon Muchado." - "Sifu" Anthony Iglesias
  10. SamHarber is offline

    Taking a break

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    Oct 2002
    Location
    Bolton, Lancashire, UK
    Posts
    2,611

    Posted On:
    9/15/2003 6:15am

    supporting member
     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Your friend Jack missed out on a lot of important aikido techniques by running away.
    Techniques such as "The two globes of Io and Europa eclipsing Uranus viewed from behind" and "Sitting in seiza clasping sword in two hands" are best performed when naked and lightly rubbed down with warm lard.

    Tsk... you're all philostines.
    Taking responsibility for my actions since 1989
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