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Thread: Paper Tigers

  1. #101

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    Quote Originally Posted by RealFolkBlues View Post
    I was understating for humor value, but I guess it didn't pan out. What did you think of his posture?
    He looks like a monkey with a broom stuck up his ass.

  2. #102

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    Quote Originally Posted by Omega Supreme View Post
    He looks like a monkey with a broom stuck up his ass.
    Lol. Yeah, he seems to write/talk ****/delete comments along those lines too. This dude needs to chill a bit, methinks.

  3. #103
    W. Rabbit's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Intermezzo. There is a serious need to step up the Siu Lum in this thread.


  4. #104

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    Quote Originally Posted by Evergrey View Post
    Storytime, Omega! Storytime please!
    So when I first opened up my first location I was only there 4 evenings out of 6 because I was holding down a full time job. After a few months I had shown up to teach some classes and two potential students show up.

    "Do you guys spar?"

    "Well yes, usually Friday nights but you have to have some experience. We sometimes have other...."

    "Do you spar?"

    Not thinking about how rude it was to interrupt I responded "Well yes but..."

    "So we can fight you?"

    "Yes, but do you have experience?"

    "Yes we do, we do XX Karate."

    Everything came to light at that point. There was this fairly hardcore karate studio who told their lower students that they were skilled enough to take out the normal blackbelts.

    "So you train with Sensei J?"

    "Yes, so you know who he is?"

    "Yeah guys. I understand where you're coming from and I know what they tell you there"

    "So you won't fight us?"

    "Just a second"

    At this point the guy who had been talking the entire time turns to his friend "See, I guess Sensei J was right..."

    At this point I had about reached my breaking point "Hold on one second, I understand what you've been told there guys, and what they say isn't wrong.... but I'm not one of those black belts"

    The second guy finally spoke up "So you're saying you're okay sparring us?"

    "You said fight"

    "We meant spar"

    "What's the difference?"

    The first guys responded "So you're okay to let us spar you?"

    "Sure what rules would you like to go by?"

    The first guys who was just a touch bigger than me replied "In the street there are no rules."

    "So you're saying you fight using street rules? Do you understand what that means?"

    "Yeah."

    "So you're fine if all my students jump in on the middle of the fight?"

    Second guy responds "Well we meant one on one."

    "That's fine but what type of rules would you like to go by?"

    "Just between you and us..."

    I think at this point they were starting to lose their patience.

    "Me against both of you?"

    "No that's stupid", the second guy responded. "Just one on one."

    "Okay, so I'll have to insist on some rules then. No poking eyes, no biting"

    "Well sure, who would do that in a fight?"

    "Some", I shrugged my shoulders "have them sign the waivers I'm going to get dressed.....oh, and roll down the doors"

    I went into the back room to get dressed. The metal roll down doors rolled down with an echo. As I heard my students talking in the other room. I'm sure they didn't know what to expect as most had been training with me for less than a year at this point.


    .....more to come.

  5. #105
    ghost55's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Every time you post on of these video I desperately wish there was a Hung Gar instructor in Portland.

    Edit: I feel like Omega is about to give us all a massive collective streetgasm.

  6. #106
    Mr. Machette's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Omega Supreme View Post
    .....more to come.
    Tease.

    Quote Originally Posted by ghost55 View Post
    Edit: I feel like Omega is about to give us all a massive collective streetgasm.
    I just felt a little pre-street leak out as I typed this...

  7. #107

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Machette View Post
    I just felt a little pre-street leak out as I typed this...
    I, uh... I think I may have experienced premature streetulation. This, uh, this has never happened to me before, I... Look, I'm stressed out about work, okay?!

  8. #108
    ermghoti's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Omega Supreme View Post
    ....more to come.
    Did they died?
    "Systema, which means, 'the system'..."

    Quote Originally Posted by strikistanian View Post
    DROP SEIONAGI ************! Except I don't know Judo, so it doesn't work, and he takes my back.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil
    Why is it so goddamn hard to find a video of it? I've seen videos I'm pretty sure are alien spacecraft. But still no good Krav.
    Quote Originally Posted by Plasma
    At the point, I must act! You see my rashguard saids "Jiu Jitsu vs The World" and "The World" was standing in front me teaching Anti-Grappling in a school I help run.
    [quote=SoulMechanic]Thank you, not dying really rewarding in more ways than I can express.[/[quote]

  9. #109

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    Part 2.

    When I get out to the work out floor the bigger guy is out there stretching out, as I thought he was wearing a brown belt. My students and other instructors are socializing with each other. I call out out to one of the other instructors to go sit down.

    "Did you want to do rounds?" I asked the guy.

    "No"

    "So we go until one of us gives up?"

    "Yes"

    At the time I thought this guy was crazy.

    "Okay" I saluted and bowed to him, "ready when you are"

    The guy got up bowed and we both started to move to the middle of the work-out floor. When I was in range I waited for him to make the first step and when he did I went "Old School Gracie" on him. Yes, I dropped, shot and to the guy down. I then grabbed his leg and threw him in an old school ankle lock. (BTW did I mention this was a hard floor not a mat?) He started to tap and I yelled "Do you give up?"

    All he did was tap and yell out so I let him go. I got up and everybody started clapping and cheering as I walked away from him.

    He yelled out "You didn't say we were doing ground stuff!"

    "I asked you what rules you wanted...."

    "Well I wasn't ready, I didn't know you guys fought on the ground too."

    I bowed to him "I guess we're done", I turned to the other guy, "Now you?" and he raised his and up and said "Nah dude, I'm fine."

    The bigger guy spoke up "I wasn't ready, I want another match now that I know we can fight on the ground."

    I shrugged my shoulders "Sure dude" and I started walking out to the middle of the floor again and started bouncing around. The bigger guy followed suit. I nodded a bow and he followed suit and we both moved methodically toward the center. I faked a shot and the guy went to immediately defend the takedown. I punched the guy in the forehead and reshot for the exact same hold I got on him before. This time he fought it off for a few more seconds and then he tapped. This time I honored the tap and let go after holding it for a second longer.

    I got up this time but there was nothing but quite murmuring as I'm sure everybody was wondering what was coming next. The guy got up and said "Okay, so you're better at me on the ground but what about your stand up?"

    At this point I realized I should have just turned this guy down from the beginning. Ah, but my ego was big and tradition still stands.

    "Fine" I said abruptly. I did a quick bow and said "Let's go"

    At this point he moved a bit slower as he saw how annoyed I was as I bounced up and down and paced waiting for him to reenter the floor. As he did he did an abrupt nod of his head I took as a bow and I assumed a kickboxing stance and waited for him to get into range. I plowed a leg kick into his leg spinning him around into a 540 spin. I proceeded to circle outside counter clockwise until he orientated himself toward me again. I faked a one/two combination and plowed a full force leg kick again dropping him to the ground. He had forgotten about our no ground fighting and he shot a charge at me where I prominently slapped him across the face (Did I mention that this was bare knuckle?) and he tumbled to the ground. Again I continued to circle to his back until he orientated himself to face me. I proceeded to follow this formula for about 2 more minutes. Every once in awhile hitting him with the jab/cross on his forehead but pretty much landing nearly a half dozen leg kicks before he finally switched stances. There I proceeded to throw side kicks and switching to inside and outside leg kicks.

    Finally I got tired of the little dance we were playing. I came in with a high kick to his head and staggered him. I then proceeded to leg kick him consecutively 4 times in a row with the 4th kick turning him upside down where he wacked his head on the ground.

    Several of my students and his friend got up to see if he was okay. I walked away and waited for him to get up. They started to get him up "So do we continue?" He shook his head and they helped him get off the floor.

    I try to make small chit chat after the fight and the rest of the night was pretty much awash. The sad thing about all that is that I actually get along with their instructor.

    PS.

    That was 1995.

  10. #110
    W. Rabbit's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Ibid, pg. 319, on the subject of "Organize This!", some very interesting Southern Shaolin claim and then a GOTCHA. This was an example of a good essay, imho. He rightfully bashes a lot of mcdojo and bullshido practices, even though he regularly goes into what I like to think of as "martial partisan" mode in others, which is counter to what my own Hung ga training teaches.

    Every now and then he writes a gem, a verbal no shadow kick like this.

    My school is one of very few in the United States recognized under the International Southern Shaolin Kung-Fu Association; a league founded by the late Grandmaster Lau Chang, a direct descendent of Southern Shaolin whose primary goal was to ensure that the original authentic code of ethics and training requirements for Kung-Fu be diligently followed by all its schools and associated members. Although many will sadly miss Grandmaster Chang, his organization remains largely intact to this day, and is recognized as the country's foremost authority in the fight for the preservation of authentic Chinese martial arts. For a nominal yearly fee any member who meets the necessary basic requirements can reap the many ebnefits of this great association, which include free black-belt testing, reduced fees for league sponsored tournaments and seminars, and yearly getaways to our famous martial arts excursion that takes you and your students to the Ancient Shaolin Temple in Henan, China!
    To many, my school may seem like the place to go to learn the real thing, especially since it is so intimately tied to such a credible-sounding organization. Others may have known right from the start that I was making it all up.
    The whole point of this little white lie was to try to get you to believe that my school is more credible and important than it actually is by attaching it to something that sounded credible and important.
    "So beware of martial arts organizations because they rarely exist for the sole benefit of martial arts."
    Last edited by W. Rabbit; 12/28/2014 3:10pm at .

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