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  1. ghost55 is offline
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    Senior Member

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    Munich, Germany
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    Posted On:
    2/28/2015 2:19pm


     Style: MMA

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Competing when you feel like garbage

    The IBJJF Munich Open is tomorrow and I feel like ****. Not as **** as on Wednesday when I went to the ER with severe abdominal pain (that is now gone), but I am still venting everything I eat several hours after I eat it from my asshole in liquid form. Unfortunately, because the IBJJF is a cynical cash whore of an org that only cares about money, they will not give out refunds FOR ANY REASON (unless your division is empty). This means I am not get my $115 back, and that is a decent chunk of change for me. Now I have two options:

    1. Not show up. Write off the money and just stay how and watch Burn Notice or some **** on Netflix. This option sucks and is for pussies. So it's out.

    2. Suck it up, stop eating things at 9pm, don't eat before competing, and compete anyways because I am not a *****. I find this option preferable, and so this is the one I am going with.

    On a scale of 1 to Brock Lesnar fighting Alistair Overeem while suffering from diverticulitis, how dumb am I being?
  2. Hadzu is online now

    Registered Member

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    Tyresö, Sweden
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    Posted On:
    2/28/2015 3:01pm


     Style: Shoo Sheetzoo

    4
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Well, you signed up to compete in an IBJJF event, so there's your first problem. Seriously though, I guess it'll come down to how you feel tomorrow, because the Holy Moment-style bowel movements don't seem like much fun. From a physical standpoint it'll suck, but it'll probably be worth it to show up and sit in 50/50 with no heel hooks for five minutes until someone wins on advantage like a true IBJJF warrior, just to know that you did it.

    So, are the relentless anal evacuations a symptom of a larger specific problem you're aware of (perhaps pertaining to your abdominal pain?), or is it just kind of a thing that's happening?
  3. Ming Loyalist is offline
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    solves problems with violence

    Join Date
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    NYC
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    Posted On:
    2/28/2015 3:27pm

    supporting member
     Style: Judo, Hung Family Boxing

    3
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    maybe don't wear a white gi.
    "Face punches are an essential character building part of a martial art. You don't truly love your children unless you allow them to get punched in the face." - chi-conspiricy
    "When I was a little boy, I had a sailor suit, but it didn't mean I was in the Navy." - Mtripp on the subject of a 5 year old karate black belt
    "Without actual qualifications to be a Zen teacher, your instructor is just another roundeye raping Asian culture for a buck." - Errant108
    "Seriously, who gives a **** what you or Errant think? You're Asian males, everyone just ignores you, unless you're in a krotty movie." - new2bjj
  4. ghost55 is offline
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    Posted On:
    2/28/2015 3:34pm


     Style: MMA

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    It was viral gastroenteritis. And a white gi is all I got. IBJJF is pretty much my only option here for competition. Subnissao was last week in a city four hours away (I have no car), and if you don't have a filthy European passport, the local ADCC people will tell you to go eat a dick. Also, more fun stuff: I am currently capable of making weight for the 57.5kg division. I signed up for the 64kg division. I was walking around at 63.6kg with a gi on last week. My current plan is to try to lock in a guillotine when the other guy goes for the standard shitty white belt single-leg, and if the other guy pulls guard I will just sit there and do nothing except for grip fight until the other person does something stupid and maybe I can take his back. I give myself a solid 80% chance of getting choked senseless in the first 3min though.
  5. Ming Loyalist is offline
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    solves problems with violence

    Join Date
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    Posted On:
    2/28/2015 4:38pm

    supporting member
     Style: Judo, Hung Family Boxing

    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    if you don't lose by DQ after losing control of a bodily function, i will be sorely disappointed in you.
    "Face punches are an essential character building part of a martial art. You don't truly love your children unless you allow them to get punched in the face." - chi-conspiricy
    "When I was a little boy, I had a sailor suit, but it didn't mean I was in the Navy." - Mtripp on the subject of a 5 year old karate black belt
    "Without actual qualifications to be a Zen teacher, your instructor is just another roundeye raping Asian culture for a buck." - Errant108
    "Seriously, who gives a **** what you or Errant think? You're Asian males, everyone just ignores you, unless you're in a krotty movie." - new2bjj
  6. ghost55 is offline
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    Senior Member

    Join Date
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    Munich, Germany
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    Posted On:
    2/28/2015 5:00pm


     Style: MMA

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I plan on making sure my bowels are empty before I get on the mats.
  7. Plasma is offline
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    Bullshido Administrator

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    Deutschland
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    Posted On:
    2/28/2015 5:11pm

    staff
     Style: Brazilian Jiu Jitsu

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    The short answer is I don't compete unless I'm in top shape and health. But losing out on $115 sucks ass.
  8. ghost55 is offline
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    Senior Member

    Join Date
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    Posted On:
    2/28/2015 5:15pm


     Style: MMA

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Yeah. I'm angry because before I got sick I was putting in a ton of extra effort to take care of myself. Three weeks out I stopped drinking, partying, staying up late, smoking certain herbal supplements, and eating shitty food. I took this **** seriously. And then my insides decided that they wanted to implode.
  9. Plasma is offline
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    Posted On:
    2/28/2015 5:19pm

    staff
     Style: Brazilian Jiu Jitsu

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by ghost55 View Post
    It was viral gastroenteritis. And a white gi is all I got. IBJJF is pretty much my only option here for competition. Subnissao was last week in a city four hours away (I have no car), and if you don't have a filthy European passport, the local ADCC people will tell you to go eat a dick. Also, more fun stuff: I am currently capable of making weight for the 57.5kg division. I signed up for the 64kg division. I was walking around at 63.6kg with a gi on last week. My current plan is to try to lock in a guillotine when the other guy goes for the standard shitty white belt single-leg, and if the other guy pulls guard I will just sit there and do nothing except for grip fight until the other person does something stupid and maybe I can take his back. I give myself a solid 80% chance of getting choked senseless in the first 3min though.
    This sounds like a terrible game plan. Figure out what you are going to do and attack don't just plan to play off your opponent. Then you are playing his game and he is probably better at it.
  10. ghost55 is offline
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    Posted On:
    2/28/2015 5:23pm


     Style: MMA

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Plasma View Post
    This sounds like a terrible game plan. Figure out what you are going to do and attack don't just plan to play off your opponent. Then you are playing his game and he is probably better at it.
    I'm concerned that I do not have the explosiveness to effectively go through on most of the takedowns I know. I guess I could try planning on pulling De La Riva guard and sweeping to mount and going for an armbar from there. Or just pulling regular guard and working for the triangle choke (one of my better subs). My main hope is that the other person will **** up so I can end it quickly, because I'm not going to do well in a drawn out match.
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