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Thread: Bullshido Haiku

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    225
    Style
    Em Tee/JewDough/BeeJayJay
    8
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Bullshido Haiku

    In light of "Your Martial Arts Suck" :)

    "Deadly"

    Ancient martial arts.
    Effective cause it is old.
    I don't need to spar.


    "Teh streets"

    Sport versus teh streets.
    I can out swim Michael Phelps,
    But in a river.


    "Deadly" Part 2
    In theory it works.
    Saw it done in the movies.
    I don't need to spar.


    "Reality Check"
    Tried using eye-pokes.
    Also attempted throat grab.
    Just got punched then choked.


    "Ex Em Ey"
    Trained in XMA.
    Starts fight with corkscrew round kick.
    Missed! Guy moved two feet.


    Let's hear yours if you got 'em. :)

  2. #2

    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Location
    Alexandria, VA
    Posts
    792
    Style
    TangSooDo/Yubiwaza
    2
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Magic pants flapping
    Toe jams between tatami
    Take wrist, not too hard.

  3. #3
    ermghoti's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    OW, MY KNEE
    Posts
    3,524
    Style
    BJJ+Sanda
    4
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Haiku has some rules
    something about the syllables
    but I can't count due to getting hit in the head a lot, I always get it wrong.
    "Your body must be like a stone, your mind... like a meatloaf."

    Quote Originally Posted by strikistanian View Post
    DROP SEIONAGI ************! Except I don't know Judo, so it doesn't work, and he takes my back.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil
    Why is it so goddamn hard to find a video of it? I've seen videos I'm pretty sure are alien spacecraft. But still no good Krav.
    Quote Originally Posted by Plasma
    At the point, I must act! You see my rashguard saids "Jiu Jitsu vs The World" and "The World" was standing in front me teaching Anti-Grappling in a school I help run.

  4. #4
    Chili Pepper's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    2,430
    Style
    Siling Labuyo Arnis
    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Invoking Bruce Lee
    Wins bullshido arguments
    No fighting needed

  5. #5

    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Location
    Alexandria, VA
    Posts
    792
    Style
    TangSooDo/Yubiwaza
    2
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Couple more:

    New long term contract
    Educational Funding Company
    A plague on your house


    Never washed my gi
    Rolling five, six days a week
    White belts pass out.


    Your Sensei is so fat,
    When he sits around the mat, he
    Sits around the mat.

  6. #6

    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Southeast WI
    Posts
    892
    Style
    aikido
    2
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I don't need your sport
    I don't need your aliveness
    I have static drills

    Aikido must work
    All the best MMA guys
    Trained under Seagal

    I don't need research
    I have strong opinions
    Oh hi, It is Fake

  7. #7

    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    225
    Style
    Em Tee/JewDough/BeeJayJay
    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    "__ing __un"

    The real Wing Chun,
    no master alive teach it,
    practiced by no one.

  8. #8
    FinalLegion's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    McKinney, TX
    Posts
    1,184
    Style
    Shotokan
    2
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I am a ninja
    I bought the black pajamas
    I am a ninja

  9. #9

    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    225
    Style
    Em Tee/JewDough/BeeJayJay
    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    "No Rules"

    I will eye-gouge you,
    if you put me in your guard.
    What is an armbar?

  10. #10
    FinalLegion's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    McKinney, TX
    Posts
    1,184
    Style
    Shotokan
    2
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    See my deadly Chun
    I will chain punch you to vic-
    Ow. This armbar hurts.

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