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  1. PDA is offline
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    Welterweight

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    Posted On:
    10/23/2013 10:36am

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     Style: MMA

    3
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    Two months? What the hell are you waiting for? He should be a purple belt by now!
    He is a brown pants yellow stripe in Poo Pee Do.
    King without a crown
  2. Permalost is online now
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    pro nonsense self defense

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    Posted On:
    10/23/2013 11:38am

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     Style: FMA, dumbek, Indian clubs

    4
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by CapnMunchh View Post
    Reminded me of the time I was judging a kids TKD tournament and a mom came up to me after a match, handed me her business card and in a serious tone told me that if I called her she would be happy to buy me a pair of glasses.
    I'd thank her for her generosity by ordering her business 2 dozen pizzas in her name or something.
  3. Omega Supreme is offline

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    Posted On:
    10/23/2013 12:06pm

    staff
     Style: Chinese Boxing

    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    Attachment 15501


    Fortunately for my children, I'm much better at being a martial arts parent than I ever was at being an actual martial artist. Sure, I had my moments karate kicking my way to glory (Hi-Yah!!) and knee barring the **** out of new BJJ students in their first week of training before they could exact revenge in week two. As it turns out though, parenting little ass kickers seems to be where I shine.

    I originally had the idea for a parenting thread because I wanted a place for us to chronicle the craziness you see from parents in the course of your training. Most martial arts schools still need kids in order to pay the bills so I know you have stories. Don't worry, we're still going to use this thread to tell stories of asshole parents but I thought I'd kick it off with some actual information that might help prevent a parent or two from being such an asshole. So this thread will be the mullet of martial arts parenting - business in the front and party in the back.

    My kids are learning to grapple at the moment, so many of my examples will be from that point of view but they'll apply to other martial arts as well. Without further delay, here are some rules to help you avoid being a shitty martial arts parent:

    1. Shut your stupid mouth. When you go to watch your kids train, sit there and be quiet. You're paying good money for your child to learn from professionals. Let them do their job. This is probably the biggest screw-up parents make. They can't stand to cut the umbilical cord for an hour and let their kids train on their own. I'll give some more specifics below, but many of the rules that follow revolve around this theme. Shut your pie hole.

    2. Don't yell at your kid across the training floor in the middle of class. I know you can't fucking stand it that Little Johnny zigged when he was supposed to zag but get over it. If you think you have something of value to add to his training, take notes and discuss it with him after class.

    3. Come to class and pay attention. Use your eyes and ears, not your mouth. This is not a daycare center. You need to know if your kid is a dick. I know your precious little flower is perfect in your eyes but sometimes these little sweet peas don't listen, are too rough with their training partners, wipe boogers on the mat and whatnot. You need to know if this is happening so you can correct your child - after class if it's not an emergency.

    4. Take the time to learn a little bit about the martial art your kid is training in. Many times, since the Gods of War have awesome senses of humor, it will be the least knowledgeable parents who loudly and repeatedly violate Rule #1. I heard a parent in a recent seminar talking loudly on his cell phone. He was telling somebody that Royce Gracie was doing a seminar at his kid's school. Of course, he pronounced Royce with the R sound. The person on the other end obviously corrected him because he said "Well IT SAYS Royce (again with the R sound) right here!" Royce was standing about ten feet away at the time. lol. I've also heard a parent refer to BJJ as Karate and Muay Thai as Mai Tai. Learn a little so you don't sound like a buffoon all the time.

    5. Every training session is not the Super Bowl. Chill the **** out. A couple weeks ago my son stuck around after class to get some rolling in. I've been encouraging him to roll with kids that are bigger than him because he's been trouncing most of the kids his own size. He was rolling with a kid that probably outweighed him by 25 lbs. The kid's father, who is a blue belt, felt the need to go stand 3 feet from them while they rolled and excitedly coach his fat son as if he were fighting for a UFC title. I would've told him to **** off, but I was wisely observing Rule #1, unlike this ass clown. Oh yeah, my son still caught him with an armbar. Usually that would mean nothing to me but this time I laughed a little on the inside.

    6. Don't hold a grudge against a kid because he has a shitty parent. This one can be tough, but the poor little bastards didn't get to choose their parents.

    7. Sandbagging at tournaments - don't do it. I know that cheesy painted gold medal Little Johnny wins after six years of wrestling by smashing a little girl who's been training for eight weeks will bring pride and respect to your family for many generations, but put your kid in the right damn division.

    8. Everybody who can beat your kid is not a sandbagger. Yes, I'm sure your kid is a cross between Jacare and Luke Skywalker but sometimes the dark side wins. Accept it. Losing is part of improving.

    9. Know when to push and when to go easy. There's nothing wrong with wanting your kid to be their best. Kids will sit on their asses, eat cheese balls and play Grand Theft Auto all day long if you let them. Sometimes a kick in the pants is a good thing. On the other hand, kids feel under the weather sometimes. Maybe they didn't sleep well. Maybe they just need a break. Let them take a day off occasionally.

    10. If you want them to be good at martial arts, focus on their attitude more than their technique. I see so many parents get bent all out of shape because their kid screws up a submission attempt but they don't pay attention to the **** that matters the most - heart and hard work. My kids' instructors have some exercises they do as a competition with the kids. Without going into detail, they're exercises that most kids are capable of winning. It's all about heart. That's where I want to see my kids putting out. I want to see them working hard. I want to see them listening. I want to see them trying and paying attention. I don't give a **** if they screw up an Omoplata.

    11. Your loud ass whiny toddler you let run around like a rabid wolverine while Little Johnny is in class is not cute. At all. Do something with that damn kid. He's fucking up the program.

    12. Seriously, shut your stupid mouth. You don't need to call him over to fix his belt when it falls off. You don't need to yell at him to use his left foot instead of his right foot. You don't need to be on the phone running your trap. You don't need to be chatting up the hot mom sitting next to you. Shut the hell up.

    I'm sure there are more crucial rules that I'm missing, but that's all that comes to mind at the moment. Feel free to add your own. Other than that, let me hear your stories about douchebag parents. I know you've got some.
    *Facepalm. I had one of these parents yesterday. I was 5 seconds from pointing the door to her.
  4. Devil is online now
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    His heart was visible, and the dismal sack that maketh excrement of what is eaten.

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    Posted On:
    10/23/2013 12:08pm

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    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Omega Supreme View Post
    *Facepalm. I had one of these parents yesterday. I was 5 seconds from pointing the door to her.
    What was she doing?
  5. catfishaggie is offline

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    Posted On:
    10/23/2013 12:11pm


     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Omega Supreme View Post
    *Facepalm. I had one of these parents yesterday. I was 5 seconds from pointing the door to her.
    Yes please do tell, moar Omega stories. Out with it you!
  6. Omega Supreme is offline

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    Posted On:
    10/23/2013 2:07pm

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     Style: Chinese Boxing

    7
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    What was she doing?
    Long story:
    We run a "Little Dragon's" class; 30 to 45 minute class for preschool kids to develop their coordination and focus. She enrolls her child with me nearly a year ago. My daughter assists in this class. I think she does a fantastic job getting the kids to listen and I often stand off to the side and just watch her teach.

    A few months ago she comes up to me and says she doesn't like the dynamic that my daughter has with her son. She doesn't use the right tone or something along that line.

    So I make a mental note that whenever she brings her son I will completely take over class. She often brings her child late because of scheduling conflicts. Yesterday I was in some pain and had decided to allow my daughter to run the class exclusively, especially since it looked like the kid was not going to shop up that day. He showed up late.

    My daughter decided that, since the kid had been there long enough, he should start learning basic etiquette. Our class rule is that you kneel at the edge of the mat and wait to be invited into the class, so my daughter told him to sit at the edge of the floor. The mom immediately start telling my daughter that she should explain it to him why he was doing it, and that's the when I jumped in. I asked the child to come over to me and kneel at the edge of the floor. My daughter will tell him when he could come into class.

    So the mom comes over to me and starts lecturing me again how she doesn't pay to have my daughter teach her son. She then tells me it confuses her son when my daughter is out there and then I "sometimes" start teaching. She then further goes on to tell me that other parents feel the same way she does and that's why they stopped coming. (She told a different story the week before).

    I took a sip of my coffee and took a deep breath. She started to say something and I held up my finger and told her to hold on a second. I explained to her the situation. I told her I have, many times in the past, bent over backwards for people just to have it blow up in my face. I never said anything like, you allow your baby to run out on the floor all the time (actually the kid would but scoot its way out into class so it was kind of cute), you undermine the instructor's authority every time you interject your opinion during class, and I you have never made it clear on what my daughter says that makes you so angry.

    So afterwards several of the other parents, who had heard the comments, came over and told me that they love the way my daughter teaches and not to change anything.

    I've been teaching for over 2 decades guys. I've had many parents like this, just not one where my daughter was involved. It kind of hits home. Maybe too close.

    *On a side not I test her for her Jr. Blackbelt next month. I'm so excited. I've got nearly a dozen instructors coming in to approve her belt.
  7. Permalost is online now
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    pro nonsense self defense

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    Posted On:
    10/23/2013 2:39pm

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     Style: FMA, dumbek, Indian clubs

    7
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Omega Supreme View Post
    So the mom comes over to me and starts lecturing me again how she doesn't pay to have my daughter teach her son.
    Because her buttscooting preschooler needs only the very best martial arts instruction!
  8. Cuddles is online now

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    Posted On:
    10/23/2013 5:45pm


     Style: being a fatty

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Omega Supreme View Post
    I never said anything like, you allow your baby to run out on the floor all the time (actually the kid would but scoot its way out into class so it was kind of cute)
    D'awwhhh Omega has a soft spot.



    I hope that kid's not eaten.
  9. goodlun is online now
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    Posted On:
    10/23/2013 7:15pm

    Join us... or die
     Style: BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Cuddles View Post
    Omega has a soft spot.
    I think it was caused by this
  10. -TANK- is offline

    Lightweight

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    Posted On:
    10/23/2013 10:48pm

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     Style: Judo, Wrestling, TKD

    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    Haha. You won't find this **** in a book on Amazon, but it's what parents need to hear if their kids train.
    Really applies to all sports- Well Done!
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