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Phrost Phucks with Phacebook Phriends' Photos
Let me tell you a story about a guy I know. His name is Scott, and he's kind of a dick. I know, South Park did the "Scott the Dick" gag first, but this guy a.) isn't Canadian, and b.) actually looks enough like the character that you'd almost think he grew up with Trey Parker or Matt Stone. He thinks MMA is stupid, listens to Rush Limbaugh at a reasonable volume during work hours, and single-handedly keeps the American fast food industry in business.
Don't get me wrong, I like Scott. I worked with him for about three years on and off active duty for the National Guard. Scott's a Recruiter, and counter-intuitively, his dickitude doesn't manifest in his day-to-day job. He's pretty damn good at it, and takes care of the people he recruits; hell, that's how I met him - he was my recruiter when I decided to join.
You see, he's not a dick because of any specific thing that he says or does, Scott's just got that je ne sais quois, or aura that precedes him into a room, telling people "huh, this guy's probably a bit of a dick". It's not even really his fault; he probably just suffers from a case of Facialis Verpa.
So I wouldn't mess with Scott, or anyone really for that matter, unless I liked the person. And my friends get the worst end of that kind of treatment. Consequently, I was inspired to photoshop a picture off Scott's Facebook account. And then I decided to do it to another person. And then another.
I ended up doing around 10 of them, based on on a weird sliding scale involving a.) how much I like the person, b.) how recently I've seen on of their posts on Facebook, c.) how easy it is to screw with them based on their Facebook photos and d.) when I finally got yelled at by my wife for spending my Friday evening behind a computer. Those of you who weren't hit in the initial round of these, don't feel bad. It's probably because I haven't seen your posts recently or your pictures would have involved more than five minutes worth of effort to affectionately ruin.
Why am I posting all this here? Because all but two of the people whose photos got this treatment, are members of Bullshido. Scott, however, isn't. He thinks this is a stupid website.
So here they go:
Scott, The American Dick
I Choke You
So far I've only had two threats of actual violence, one of which I'm absolutely certain I earned and will eventually receive. Can you guess which one earned it?