Etiquette in BJJ - Did I violate it?

**Mr.Miyagi** · Posted On: 8/25/2012 2:43am

Tap next time or pass, don't try and sub inside the guard. Who cares if you tap.

Treat her the same as everyone else, use some common sense, and don't be an asshole. Focus on technique, treat her decently like everyone else you should roll with, if she is new as well be nice and friendly. Simple as that.

Just because everyone in your gym appears to feel like they need to "win" in free rolling doesn't mean that's the case, and if it is it doesn't mean you have to replicate it. Roll to learn, roll to have fun, and if competing and training for that specifically focus on that.

But yeah, I think you are over analysing what's going on, as well as your posts when you are writing them so you are coming across as a douche more than someone with a serious interest in "I don't know what's going on, please help me and let me know if I've committed some BJJ faux pas.

**dflanmod** · Posted On: 8/25/2012 3:05am

So to kinda illustrate the point about how you're coming across here on the boards.

Originally Posted by tangler

I should also say that I am argumentative and will sometimes argue just for the sake of arguing, which can make me seem douchier than I am.

In response to some of the more recent comments:
DFlanmod and It Is Fake, you guys are both pretty right, I think. I'll work on it. Although I am not actually a bad partner in IRL for drilling, just bad for Rolling, because I am pretty new to it and didn't realize the expectations.

The Question, thx for the words, I do want to improve and think I am a decent partner in drills which I understand the intention of. I just suck at rolling cause I'm new to it.

Now right here you come across as somebody who has heard advice, accepted it and decided to act upon it. You sound like that new guy who was unsure if he made a mistake, asked, learned something and is ready to move on.

For a brief moment I'm thinking, Okay maybe this guy is not an asshat and there may just be hope for him.

Originally Posted by Tangler

Goodlun, all due respect, I am really new to this, the so-called noob has been doing this for at least 6 months longer than me (I have only been doing it for 2). Just FYI. As for your second comment, okay. lol.

Then comes this bit and we're back to square one. With the snotty "she's been doing this for 6 months longer" blah blah what the ****?

Now you're back to the coming off like a doucher routine.

**ermghoti** · Posted On: 8/25/2012 8:16am

Originally Posted by dflanmod

Then comes this bit and we're back to square one. With the snotty "she's been doing this for 6 months longer" blah blah what the ****?

Now you're back to the coming off like a doucher routine.

Or he thinks 8 months makes one a not-noob.

**Vorpal** · Posted On: 8/25/2012 8:22am

I try to go into every class with an idea of something I want to try to accomplish during live rolling (sweep, submission, pass,) and I always try to execute the "move of the day" (did it for the first time last week, only took three years).

***jnp*** · Posted On: 8/25/2012 2:16pm

tangler, let's plant an idea in your head now, and one day it will bear fruit. You go to class to learn, not to win. If you want to win meaningfully, go to a tournament.*

I have a training partner who says, "If I'm not tapping, I'm not learning." He is a black belt, and while his point is a bit exaggerated, people tend to progress the fastest when their opponent's skill is slightly above their own. Adaptation comes more quickly when the adjustments necessary to improve are smaller, as opposed to someone crushing their training partner the whole round. The person being crushed never gets to work on anything besides maintaining good breathing in a bad situation.

Learn from your mistakes. Rather than worrying about who beats you, analyze what you did that contributed to them getting the submission.

*I don't recommend competing in a tournament with less than a year's experience. This is due to the excessive sandbagging that is often the case these days.

**Nefron** · Posted On: 8/25/2012 3:45pm

Originally Posted by Vorpal

I try to go into every class with an idea of something I want to ezekiel during live rolling (ezekiel, ezekiel, ezekiel,) and I always try to execute the "ezekiel".

Yeah. This is the right training mindset.

**ermghoti** · Posted On: 8/25/2012 4:18pm

Originally Posted by Nefron

Yeah. This is the right training mindset.

So, what's your favorite choke then?

**Nefron** · Posted On: 8/25/2012 4:22pm

Originally Posted by ermghoti

So, what's your favorite choke then?

Favorite? Like there are more then one?

Oh, I didn't quite understand what you were asking.

My favorite ezekiel is when I'm in my little opponents guard. I love it how they try to throw up their tiny legs for an armbar while I'm driving in with all my weight. I feel my hand holding the sleeve pulsating, like its going to rip off at any moment. I make my warface and look them in the eye. Then they tap.

My girlfriend won't make love to me when I'm wearing long sleeves.

**Devil** · Posted On: 8/26/2012 2:25pm

I think the chick should spend less time bitching and more time defending your spazz choke. Yeah, it's going to suck for her and it's probably not the way she prefers to spend her training time. But it's also a good training opportunity for her. In any self defense situation, spazz tactics from a bigger, stronger opponent are what she's probably going to be up against.

If she's got some experience, she should be accustomed to noob tactics and understand it will pass. She should not be having a fucking aneurysm and whining about it. She should also realize everyone in the class isn't a noob. She can suck it up, roll with you for five minutes, then move on to someone else who will make her feel warm and fuzzy inside.

**It is Fake** · Posted On: 8/26/2012 2:46pm

Originally Posted by Devil

I think the chick should spend less time bitching and more time defending your spazz choke. Yeah, it's going to suck for her and it's probably not the way she prefers to spend her training time. But it's also a good training opportunity for her. In any self defense situation, spazz tactics from a bigger, stronger opponent are what she's probably going to be up against.

If she's got some experience, she should be accustomed to noob tactics and understand it will pass. She should not be having a fucking aneurysm and whining about it. She should also realize everyone in the class isn't a noob. She can suck it up, roll with you for five minutes, then move on to someone else who will make her feel warm and fuzzy inside.

I'd agree if she wasn't a noob herself. He's whining about it now and I wouldn't be surprised, from his attitude, if he whined about it then and it led to her outburst.