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  1. #1
    eloneamigo
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    When to pull the trigger.

    Today was a pretty traumatic for my gf and her daughter, which was her tenth birthday today. We were at the supermarket and some asshole decided that he was going to park right in front of the supermarket, he waved me by, and I said, “ Hey man it’s hard to get by when you are parked in the middle of the road.”

    He got butthurt, and decided to try and cut me off as if he wanted to fight, I was in fight or flight mode and something struck me odd, I couldn’t think for **** what the next right step to take was because there was a crying 10 year old, and my gf in the car. I was looking at them and they had blank stares. Part of me wanted to get out of the car and elbow his face in, but then another part of me wanted to be responsible and not promote avoidable violence in front of my gf’s child.

    He then began yelling at me that if I want to die get out of the car, and I started to laugh a little bit, and that pissed him off, then he said he was going to rape my gf and her 10 yo daughter.

    This changed things for me and I was going to fight mode, but then instead; since the guy never actually got out of his car, I thought why progress the situation? I grabbed my phone and took down a partial license before he took off after I said I called the police, and the color, make and model, and stared at the guy to make sure I remembered what he looked like. (Should have taken a picture of him and post it on here) So if I see him again there would be no mistake.

    I had a serious adrenaline dump during the whole situation, and feel like I wasn’t able to think as clearly in a situation like this because my family was there. Is that normal for most? I have a completely different mental state if I was just with my friends, if I was just riding with a buddy, I would have probably just engaged the guy by myself.

    After the whole incident, I went to my neighbor’s house who is a cop, and filed a report so it was on paper that this dipshit threatened me and my family, so if I see him again and have to defend myself, then there is precedence on the matter with the local authorities (CYA).

    I guess I could have avoided this whole situation, if I would have just kept the obvious to myself and just keep my mouth shut; essentially that, “this guy is an inconsiderate asshole,” and no need to waste family time on the matter.

    At the end of the day I feel pretty stupid, because it’s hard for me to let go of now, as I still really want to elbow this dipshit in the face, but instead, I went to the gym and did some MT bagwork and cardio which made me feel a little better.

    What would you guys have done in this situation? I tend to try and avoid fights outside of the gym at all costs, I think what I am going to start doing is telling assholes like this if they want to fight, they can meet me at the gym in the ring. I am so paranoid about going to jail for something like manslaughter for taking something that could have been avoided too far for not thinking clearly in the heat of the moment, my future is looking promising for once, and I don’t want to screw it up for the first time in my life.

    Also this guy could have a good reason for parking there, but his reaction was ridiculous, and in my opinion negates his sob story, if there was one. Either or I just wanted to rant about this in a space where similar guys are.

    Aloha from paradise.

  2. #2

    Join Date
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    really the best thing to do is just keep it to yourself, it sucks but that will always be the best thing to do. Unless you your family or someone else is in immediate danger. and if you feel the situation could heighten call the police. I know everything I just said everyone knows and I sure you do as well, good call on the license though and smart move going to your cop buddy.

  3. #3
    My dog is cuter and smarter than yours. Join us... or die
    BKR's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by eloneamigo View Post

    This changed things for me and I was going to fight mode, but then instead; since the guy never actually got out of his car, I thought why progress the situation? I grabbed my phone and took down a partial license before he took off after I said I called the police, and the color, make and model, and stared at the guy to make sure I remembered what he looked like. (Should have taken a picture of him and post it on here) So if I see him again there would be no mistake.
    Good response.

    I had a serious adrenaline dump during the whole situation, and feel like I wasn’t able to think as clearly in a situation like this because my family was there. Is that normal for most? I have a completely different mental state if I was just with my friends, if I was just riding with a buddy, I would have probably just engaged the guy by myself.
    Adrenaline dump is usual. Engaging an idiot like that would have been a mistake under the circumstances.


    After the whole incident, I went to my neighbor’s house who is a cop, and filed a report so it was on paper that this dipshit threatened me and my family, so if I see him again and have to defend myself, then there is precedence on the matter with the local authorities (CYA).
    How do you do that, was he on duty?


    I guess I could have avoided this whole situation, if I would have just kept the obvious to myself and just keep my mouth shut; essentially that, “this guy is an inconsiderate asshole,” and no need to waste family time on the matter.
    That is exactly what ou should have done. Keep your mouth shut.

    At the end of the day I feel pretty stupid, because it’s hard for me to let go of now, as I still really want to elbow this dipshit in the face, but instead, I went to the gym and did some MT bagwork and cardio which made me feel a little better.
    I'd say that's a healthy way to work off your feelings.


    What would you guys have done in this situation? I tend to try and avoid fights outside of the gym at all costs, I think what I am going to start doing is telling assholes like this if they want to fight, they can meet me at the gym in the ring. I am so paranoid about going to jail for something like manslaughter for taking something that could have been avoided too far for not thinking clearly in the heat of the moment, my future is looking promising for once, and I don’t want to screw it up for the first time in my life.
    Other than mouthing off to the guy you did the right thing. Try not to take things personally. He was a general asshole, parking there had nothing to do with you.

    Fighting assholes like that is a mistake anywhere unless you are defending yourself. Why bother? Just so you can feel better?



    Also this guy could have a good reason for parking there, but his reaction was ridiculous, and in my opinion negates his sob story, if there was one. Either or I just wanted to rant about this in a space where similar guys are.
    That's true, maybe he was waiting for his handicapped grandmother or something. In any case, getting into a fight over where he parked would be silly, IMO. Let's say you got out of your car and beat the crap out of the guy. Cops come, he's beat up, you are fine, guess who may well go to jail for battery? Not him. Plus civil liability. All for what?
    Falling for Judo since 1980

    "You are wrong. Why? Because you move like a pregnant yak and talk like a spazzing 'I train UFC' noob." -DCS

    "The best part of getting you worked up is your backpack full of irony and lies." -It Is Fake

  4. #4
    PointyShinyBurn's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    You did the right thing. But there's some monkey dominance-game part of your brain for which walking away from a fight, especially one you could have one won, is always going to feel terrible.

  5. #5
    slamdunc's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by PointyShinyBurn View Post
    You did the right thing. But there's some monkey dominance-game part of your brain for which walking away from a fight, especially one you could have one won, is always going to feel terrible.
    This is where you start second-guessing your decision. It has happened to me numerous times, no matter how I play it out in my mind, I know that I would've won. On the other hand, I feel like I just lost because I didn't follow through.



    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    You can not intellectualize your way to being a competent fighter.

  6. #6
    jnp's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Next time it's a special day for someone in your family unit, blow all the assholes off that day. In fact, brushing off jerks is seldom bad advice.

    I look at it this way, if it had been me, I would have completely lost my cool when he said anything about raping my family. If I kept my mouth shut, jerkface and I would never interact and I would continue to celebrate the child's birthday.

    I hope you have apologized to your girlfriend and her daughter. Not so much for what you did, mind you. More for the situation that ensued afterward.
    Shut the hell up and train.

  7. #7

    Join Date
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Not in front of the kids. either you beat him up, or he beats you up. It's a loose loose situation, the "come to my gym and we will fight" is not bad, but if the asshole is vindictive and has ready backup, he now knows were to find you. I did that once to a man on the road after the police was called (took them 30 minutes) and he clearly didn't want to engage me no more, but he did promise to send a few of his big boxing friends to "change my scull with punches" obviously nothing happened later, fucktards like that usually don't have friends that willingly will go and risk themselves for him. (i also personally know the serious few boxers in my town).

  8. #8
    eloneamigo
    Guest
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    [QUOTE=BKR;2703492]Good response.



    Adrenaline dump is usual. Engaging an idiot like that would have been a mistake under the circumstances.




    How do you do that, was he on duty?
    [QUOTE=BKR;2703492]

    My neighbor had the police

    [QUOTE=BKR;2703492]

    My neighbor had incident forms in his truck, so before I forgot the pertinent info I wanted to get everything down. He told me pretty much the same thing, good job for not pounding him, bad job for not shutting up.

    After sleeping on everything, I feel like a complete jackass for opening my mouth, especially on her birthday, there was no point to prove, there was no danger from driving around the idiot, which ultimately puts me into the same category as the idiot running his mouth. Normally I don't even sweat these things because in Hawaii 80% of the people on the road suck at driving anyway, so it shouldn't be a shock or anything, and it's something that shouldn't be taken personally, but rather at this and just laugh it off.

    Also like PointyShinyBurn said some primal portion of my brain went over the situation and was wondering why when he threatened my family and he was half his size why not just destroy him? It was something that I am ultimately glad did not happen, and in the end I feel I made the right choice. The next time I have the option of "keeping it real" I should just forget about it and move on. Life is too short to intentionally waste time on assholes and in the end nothing is solved. Ultimately I am just really disappointed in myself.

    I appreciate all of the responses, I am trying to better myself on a daily basis, but yesterday I failed immensely as a man, but even more importantly to my family, because I am better than that. Anyway take care gentlemen, I'd like to thank everyone for their thoughts on the matter.

    Aloha.
    Last edited by eloneamigo; 7/11/2012 11:45am at .

  9. #9
    It is Fake's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by erezb View Post
    Not in front of the kids. either you beat him up, or he beats you up. It's a loose loose situation, the "come to my gym and we will fight" is not bad, but if the asshole is vindictive and has ready backup, he now knows were to find you. I did that once to a man on the road after the police was called (took them 30 minutes) and he clearly didn't want to engage me no more, but he did promise to send a few of his big boxing friends to "change my scull with punches" obviously nothing happened later, fucktards like that usually don't have friends that willingly will go and risk themselves for him. (i also personally know the serious few boxers in my town).
    Ahhh hhaaaaa this explains your current run of "WATCH OUT THEY CAN FIND YOU" fear posting of late.

    Yeah, dumb **** happens. You learned and you'll be better prepared next time.
    Last edited by It is Fake; 7/11/2012 11:34am at .

  10. #10
    ChenPengFi's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by eloneamigo View Post
    Today was a pretty traumatic for my gf and her daughter, which was her tenth birthday today. We were at the supermarket and some asshole decided that he was going to park right in front of the supermarket, he waved me by, and I said, “ Hey man it’s hard to get by when you are parked in the middle of the road.”
    ....
    You ain't from 'round these parts are ya?

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