Bum Wine (Classic from the interwebz)
I came across this old favourite site of mine, read it ages ago reading it again, still made me laugh.
I have never tasted any of these products but these reviews make me want to.
An excerpt for Thunderbird:
Has anyone here drunk Thunderbird? I would be interested to hear the experience.
As pictured to the left, look for the pigeon feces and you'll find this old bird. As soon as you taste this swill, it will be obvious that its makers cut every corner possible in its production to make it cheap. Self-proclaimed as "The American Classic," Thuderbird is Vinted and bottled by E&J Gallo Winery, in in Modesto, CA. Disguised like Night Train, the label says that it is made by "Thunderbird, Ltd." If your taste buds are shot, and you need to get trashed with a quickness, then "T-bird" is the drink for you. Or, if you like to smell your hand after pumping gas, look no further than Thunderbird. As you drink on, the bird soars higher while you sink lower. The undisputed leader of the five in foulness of flavor, we highly discourage driking this ghastly mixture of unknown chemicals unless you really are a bum.
Thunderbird was the teenage pisshead's drink of choice in notheren England of the late 80s/early 90s. If a friend's parents went away for a weekend they'd often come home to find red/blue puke stains on the carpets.
For the record: it's fucking rank.
I played Edward 40Hands with a bottle of tbird and a bottle of night train.
I have never been so stupid since.
My digestive pyrotechnics were amazing.
What kind of poncy tramps do they have in America? Wine?
Proper tramps drink Tennent's Super or Special Brew.
Where do you stand on Buckfast?
Originally Posted by judoka_uk
As far away from someone drinking it as possible.
Originally Posted by CrackFox
I had Buckfast in Scotland at Hogmanay. Can't say I remember being a big fan.
Originally Posted by CrackFox
I was under the impression it was a North American only vintage.
Originally Posted by thrutch
One of my first experiences drinking was with Cisco when I was at a party in junior high. Barf. Kids do some DUMB ****. My buddy hurled all over his brand new suede Air Jordans. Yeah, it was the end of the 80s or beginning of the 90s.
I also have funny memories of Dagger wine. When I was in junior high I worked at a grocery store. Here, you can't buy alcohol until 1:00 p.m. on Sundays. Every Sunday at 12:58 a bum named James would be waiting in line with two bottles of Dagger. Then at 1:01 he'd pick up already smoked cigarettes from the parking lot to enjoy for himself. You know what they say - one man's trash is another man's treasure.
Once when I was a kid I was with my Dad in a store when he ran into an old classmate who was now a straight up drunk homeless bum. He was buying a bottle of Wild Irish Rose. After a brief conversation, my old man told him to go get another bottle and he'd buy. As he was walking away he told him to make it two more bottles. The guys said, "Okay thanks." He takes a few more steps and my Dad says "Get three more." He came back with only two more bottles and my Dad assured me he didn't hear the offer for a third or he wouldn't have returned with just two.
Last edited by Devil; 5/17/2012 11:33am at .
Is that because you didn't like it or because you can't remember ANYTHING?
Originally Posted by Auszi
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