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  1. Arskanator is offline

    Registered Member

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    Jul 2009
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    Pori, Finland
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    Posted On:
    9/18/2012 11:43am


     Style: Hokutoryu Ju-jutsu

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by OZZ View Post
    Nice witticism , Colin.
    If Seagal had played his cards right by actually learning a little something over the years, and was not such an idiot - he could have had a spot in the Expendables movies.
    Maybe. But instead, we got to lol at him playing a mexican in a movie that was actually decent.
    Does that panda look scared to you guys?
  2. Arskanator is offline

    Registered Member

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    Jul 2009
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    Pori, Finland
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    351

    Posted On:
    9/18/2012 11:44am


     Style: Hokutoryu Ju-jutsu

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Also, love the ballad. So funny xD
  3. LesbianSeagal is offline

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    Aug 2012
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    Posted On:
    9/18/2012 5:55pm


     Style: Freestyle scientific

    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I don't know about you guys, but I personally can't wait until Stevie is found dead on the toilet with a bucket of extra-crispy between his legs.
  4. Permalost is offline
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    pro nonsense self defense

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    Nov 2012
    Location
    San Diego
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    Posted On:
    9/18/2012 6:14pm

    supporting member
     Style: FMA, dumbek, Indian clubs

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by LesbianSeagal View Post
    I don't know about you guys, but I personally can't wait until Stevie is found dead on the toilet with a bucket of extra-crispy between his legs.
    I'm sure there will be something far more inappropriate there than a bucket of chicken.
  5. LesbianSeagal is offline

    Registered Member

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    Aug 2012
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    Posted On:
    9/18/2012 6:16pm


     Style: Freestyle scientific

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Permalost View Post
    I'm sure there will be something far more inappropriate there than a bucket of chicken.
    Well there's already his stomach...
  6. bobyclumsyninja is online now
    bobyclumsyninja's Avatar

    :)

    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Bahstun
    Posts
    7,009

    Posted On:
    9/18/2012 10:45pm

    supporting member
     Style: Ex-Tiger KF, ex-SanDa

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    he'll OD on spray-on-hair fumes, that man was balding in his breakout movie...decades ago.
  7. LesbianSeagal is offline

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    Aug 2012
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    Posted On:
    9/19/2012 12:12am


     Style: Freestyle scientific

    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by bobyclumsyninja View Post
    he'll OD on spray-on-hair fumes, that man was balding in his breakout movie...decades ago.
    He was faking his fighting-ability too, it was cheesier than a thousand fondue-pots.
  8. Sri Hanuman is offline
    Sri Hanuman's Avatar

    Senior Member

    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Chicago, IL
    Posts
    6,459

    Posted On:
    9/21/2012 2:05pm

    Join us... or die
     Style: Cheng Man Ching Taijiquan

    2
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Oh, are we having a ballad-off? And no one invited ballad monkey? Monkey sad now.

    No photoshop for you. Hum this to the tune of "the boxer" by Simon and Garfunkel.

    I am just a Lama from a village in Tibet
    Though a while ago I tried to to lay some claims to ties with local native Indians

    Swinging arms
    Acting big and tough
    I travelled all the way down to Japan
    Wearing black pajamas throwing tiny men

    When I mastered my aikido
    I flew back to USA
    Using only my aikido kicks to lift me from the ground

    When I landed down on Hollywood
    I flattened Gene Lebell
    All the stories that he tells are lies
    And people who collaborate are mockers and assumes, in their anger and their shame
    And they're lying and they're lying
    But the Lama still remains

    When I hit it big in Hollywood
    I knew that I was set
    Now the world has seen my awesomeness
    And knew that I could snap their backs with powerful aikido moves

    I do declare
    I like hookers of that south-east Asian flare
    And I like to punch them while they lick my hair

    Now my movies go to DVDs
    Without much public screen
    But that only means they're awesome
    And that viewers can not wait to take the action home

    All my character are similar
    And all the plot lines blur
    Something something cop
    Revenge and something something
    With a gun and tiny Asian girls

    Then the stuff with the mob
    And maybe jail and ninjas too
    Throw in sex scenes with a wrinkly ass or two

    Now I'm Sheriffing louisiana
    Riding in a van
    Getting winded climbing stairs
    And polishing a handgun that I can not shoot

    Buy my music and sports drink
    Mojo Priest was awesome
    Crystal Cave was moot

    Now I'm packing up my awesomeness and hitting UFC
    Teaching my Aikido kicks
    Out there for the world to see

    And I'm awesome and I'm winning
    And there's no one quite as good
    It's too bad that all these mockers
    False assumers and detractors
    Are all bleeding me
    (my hair's receding me)

    So when Buddha comes to pick me up
    We're heading to Tibet
    To stop ninjas and Mongolians
    From stealing all the secret scrolls of Lamahood
    And we'll take William Shatner
    And his technicolor hair
    And we'll live on top of Sumeru
    And take some comfort there.
    =================
    Kama Sutra blue belt.

    Quote Originally Posted by Emevas View Post
    I used to **** guys like you in prison.
    Quote Originally Posted by Rock Ape View Post
    Dude I kill people for a fucking living.

    Dipshit
  9. Devil is offline
    Devil's Avatar

    His heart was visible, and the dismal sack that maketh excrement of what is eaten.

    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    6,363

    Posted On:
    9/21/2012 3:13pm

    supporting member
     

    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by bobyclumsyninja View Post
    he'll OD on spray-on-hair fumes, that man was balding in his breakout movie...decades ago.
    Ten thousand bucks says he dies of popcorn lung.
  10. Permalost is offline
    Permalost's Avatar

    pro nonsense self defense

    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Location
    San Diego
    Posts
    12,365

    Posted On:
    9/21/2012 5:15pm

    supporting member
     Style: FMA, dumbek, Indian clubs

    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    Ten thousand bucks says he dies of popcorn chicken.
    fixed
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