Looking for life advice

**Uglybugly** · Posted On: 4/24/2012 4:48pm

Originally Posted by RurikGreenwulf

Other advice I heard or saw is that when you are choosing between 2 things just toss a coin in the air and You will see yourself wishing for the coin to fall on a particular side Thats how you know when you want something in your heart

I do this alot.

**Uglybugly** · Posted On: 4/24/2012 5:16pm

Originally Posted by nils

Start by thinking about why you want those things in the first place. Are those really desires of yourself, or are they coming from your desire to please others. Spent some time alone, sort them out.

You know.. Most of what I desire is things I didn't have in my early life. I was brought up by a poor family, my grandfather used to beat me up and there were almost no other kids around to play with because it was in a rural part of the country.

I basically desire to be rich, good at fighting and good with people. Almost like James Bond .. only real. Bjj and judo have somewhat filled in one of those needs. Now I need fix the other parts. Improving my people skills will benefit me in all aspects of my life. It is probably the most important thing I can work on.

**Uglybugly** · Posted On: 4/24/2012 5:21pm

Originally Posted by JohnnyCache

The biggest change you can make is from blaming to solving. You're thin and you want girls? Instead of going "I'm too thin to get girl x" go find a girl that likes em narrow.

Lyle lovett got julia Roberts. Bobcat goldwaith got nikki cox.

What i am saying is work for the things you don't have, but don't blame them for each other. Girls, money, etc - success- come from congruity, work, and luck.

so true.. I don't think body shape is everything when it comes to girls. I think girls are attracted to other qualities then big biceps.
I think I need to make a plan for myself. It will give me purpose.

**Uglybugly** · Posted On: 4/24/2012 5:24pm

Originally Posted by nils

Well, what exactly are your expectations?

hehe. kind of silly but deep down I want to be this powerful multimillionaire that travels the globe in his custom made airship. manageing his company from the skies and meeting new people from different nations each and every day :P

I have even made a drawing of the airship

**Uglybugly** · Posted On: 4/24/2012 5:32pm

Originally Posted by Devil

Honestly bro, if you think fashion and getting laid are important topics when discussing self improvement, you're probably hopeless. It sounds like you're immature and need to grow up.

I think fashion is important because it can **** up or save the first impression. It is much easier to get around people when they like you. Everything becomes easier this way. getting laid is important because we are all animals and it is a very important animal instinct.. and there will be alot of problems if this is not in place.

I know a guy that have problems with fashion and girls.. it is not pretty.. everything he does in life turns to **** because he don't have his appearance and his balls in check.

**Uglybugly** · Posted On: 4/24/2012 5:41pm

Originally Posted by TheMightyMcClaw

Do have any basic sewing skills? Because one simple way to make blazers, dress shirts, and anything else that's button-up look about a million times better is to cut off the ugly plastic buttons that they come with, and replace them with metal shank buttons.
And seriously, check out thrift stores. Also, as far as bikes go, check out craigslist before hitting up bike shops. You can generally find decent-condition ones for pretty cheap.
What I'm trying to say is, second hand markets are one of the secrets to enlightenment.

I have started checking second hand sites for stuff I want now. gonna save alot of money. When it comes to fashion. I am not a fan of metal. Not that there is anything wrong with metal it is just not my style. I try to be neat, clean and fresh. I guess I have a classic style that fits in with a certain group in the city I live in. Maybe I will post some picture of things I normally use.

**Uglybugly** · Posted On: 4/24/2012 6:01pm

Originally Posted by TheMightyMcClaw

Look around craigslist. I have two vintage road bikes (a main one and a backup), which cost 125 and 60 bucks respectively. They're not the best bikes, and Seattle seems to have a booming second hand bike market, so that might be a bit cheaper than where you live.
Follow up: where do you live?

I live in Oslo, Norway.

**Uglybugly** · Posted On: 4/24/2012 6:14pm

Originally Posted by Res Judicata

Here is life from where I sit. The OP sounds like a kid, so he probably won't get it.

I'll be 38 in a few days. I'm an established, reasonably affluent professional--with luck I'll make partner this year. Basically, I'm middle-aged workaholic suburban suit guy. I worked hard to get here--years of school, many 60+ hour work weeks, etc. I have a nice little house in the 'burbs. But I'm also a 10-year cancer survivor (as in, you have a 40% of dying very soon, very painfully, If not, you'll be fine after a year of brutal chemo.) I'm in pain literally every day from various injuries, etc. My immediate family is utterly screwed up (crack addict sister with four kids, mentally ill parent, step-parent suicided, etc.) It's probably not the life I would have chosen, but it's mine.

Here's my advice: marry the right woman. Money is nice, it helps. Find something you like or want to do that will pay the bills. Get good at it. School is a means to an end-I'm a lawyer and I needed school for that. Or pick up a trade if that's for you--one of my friends is a plumber, he loves the work and makes a great living. But, really, marry the right woman. I did and it makes my life worthwhile. Marry the wrong one and things may not turn out so well.

I am sorry to hear about your situation. I must admit that I admire your strength.

About the "right woman" part. I totally agree. One of the reason that I try to become more skilled with girls is that I want to have the freedom of choice and also the skills to keep the peace at home.

**Uglybugly** · Posted On: 4/24/2012 6:28pm

Originally Posted by TheMightyMcClaw

While most everything Devil has said so far has been total bullshit, the marriage thing has some truth in it. Perhaps more particularly, I'd say "don't marry the wrong woman." I watched an uncle sink 20 years of his life into a shitty marriage caused by an oops baby, and it was pretty much nonstop suffering; getting divorced was the best thing he ever did with his life.

this happen to somebody in my family too. One day the wife had taken a big ass loan on the house they owned together.. and she went on holiday and wasted all of their money. Poor fucker didn't know what hit him suddenly he went from owning his own car and house and being a normal man with a wife too getting kicked out of his house. To top it all he also had a brain tumor and he started using drugs.. I think he started using drugs because he was very very depressed. He tried to take this to court but he died in the process. stress, cancer and drug abuse finished him of.

**TheMightyMcClaw** · Posted On: 4/24/2012 6:52pm

I might be a little bit off here - in which case you can disregard all my advice - but I get the impression that you're looking more for "Life Hacks" - ways to do the **** you're already doing, but better - rather than seeking out the secrets of enlightenment and obtaining True Buddha Nature.
Too bad you're not into metal. Northern Europe is sort of where it's at for that stuff, where I have to weed through all the shitty American metal bands.