Posted On:1/19/2012 1:22pm
Style: American Kickboxing
It's cool to get on the net and brag about all the beatings you've tossed people through the years. This is dedicated to your losses. preferablly your first one. How did you react to it, did it motivate you? How did you feel lookng over and seeing the expression on your girlfriend's face while you were getting your ass beat?
pro nonsense self defense
Posted On:1/19/2012 1:56pm
Style: FMA, dumbek, Indian clubs
There really is a lack of these on the web, considering how many "hey guys I won this fight last night" kind of posts you see. I have an older brother, so I can't even remember my first asskicking, but a few come to mind:
-my first schoolyard fight. Don't remember why it started. I landed a hard forehand slap to the side of the head, it pissed the other guy off, he football tackled me, landed on top and started hitting me. It was like I was fighting Ralphie from a Christmas story.
-my first martial arts challenge match. When I was a teenager, i had just started learning kung fu. After literally 2 weeks of training, some other highschooler heard I was training and asked if I'd accept a challenge. He had been doing JKD for a few years, and my two weeks of kung fu was no match for him. He beat me effortlessly, mostly by roundhouse kicks to the legs, which I had no idea how to defend, and were custom tailored to my dumb low sideways stance.
-my first pankration match. Was in the heavyweight division, paired off against a wrestler. My background was kung fu at the time. I went to punch him at the beginning of the match, he ducked under and took me down. I pulled guard, he passed it to half guard, I regained full guard, and most of the match went on like that. All the while he was throwing strikes to my chest (wasn't allowed to hit face). Eventually he laid his forearm against my throat and leaned in hard, and I tapped because great kung fu masters tap to grinding techniques.
My 2nd Dog Brothers gathering. Started the day with knife fighting (using aluminum or wood trainers). Was going up an experienced Dog Brother (Boo Dog). Right towards the beginning of the match, we advance towards each other, and I'm keeping my eyes on what his knife hand is going to do, and because I fixate on that, I eat a right roundhouse kick to the face, fall to the ground and do my best to keep him away with my legs, resulting in stabbed legs. You can see it around 1:00 here:
Posted On:1/19/2012 2:20pm
Style: Chinese Boxing
I got knock silly being the training partner of the guy who ended up taking the middleweight title championship in my first kickboxing fight. (In other words we were training partners but different opponents.
Posted On:1/19/2012 2:32pm
Style: Muay Thai
Well, I've taken a pretty hefty amount of whoopings, but one does stand out over the rest. I'd never been hit dead-on in the liver before, and nobody had really warned me what it was like. So when I ate a clean shot off a sloppy overhand, I was pretty sure my guts had turned into a singularity and were trying to crush my body down to a single point all at once. Also, after the pain receded a little, I distinctly remember fervently hoping that I hadn't crapped in my shorts.
Posted On:1/19/2012 2:36pm
ive only been in 2 fights outside the ring and won em both. havent lost a fight in the ring
so.... y'all are bitches.
oh except when i was a kid and my brother would routinely bash my head through the walls at home. i think by the time we both left there were 3-4 holes in the gib board that had to be fixed
Posted On:1/19/2012 2:39pm
permalost: the Ralfie comparison was hilarious. Anyone who even enters that dog brother's **** gets props from me. To explain it and put a vid up is just..... wow. I mean, that kick to the face man, holy ****.
Posted On:1/19/2012 3:19pm
Also, at my first Bullshido throwdown I was the first to volunteer to spar with Clyde. He had the r34l kempo, and whenever I tried to punch him he'd kick my liver, and it was awful. He would also attack with slaps to the face and footsweeps.
Posted On:1/19/2012 3:24pm
Oh man. Here it goes: I brought my girlfriend to a tournament when I did tkd at the beginning of high school. Not helping that she was pretty. I got sidetracked of course. Lost to someone I've beaten previously and to someone who was a lower rank. End result: I never brought my gf to a tournament again, I've never lost neither do to the extreme humility.
Posted On:1/19/2012 3:35pm
Style: Short Fist Boxing
I think the first time I had my ass handed to me in elementary school was this time I suckered a kid and he freaked.
In retrospect , I guess I deserved it. I was taken aback by the fury of his onslaught and just did the best I could. He beat me up..no marks or bruises though.
I was about 8 at the time.
But in a real fight...hmmm...I guess maybe the fight I had with Big Steve when I was like 22 or so.
Big Steve was just that BIG,,and he was mad at me for screwing his gf..not while he was with her, mind you, but beforeheand. It was a jealousy thing..
Anyways, I hear he's looking to kick my ass and of course I run into him one day when he's getting off work.
He challenges me, and although I realize I'm a bit out of my depth, I stand up to him. We start going at it and he jerseys me ( which is the ultimate humiliation for a Canadian boy) and uses his weight to his advantage, throws me on a car, we roll over it etc. etc. I almost turned the tide with a spinning elbow..but it was not to be. He saw it coming and it didn't connect hard enough to stun him.
Fight was eventually broken up by a couple of bystanders. A nearby storeowner had phoned the police and I ended up getting charged with Causing A Disturbance. Additionally, the owner of the damaged car got my name form the cops and tried to get his insurance company after me ..after losing the fight, I didn't think that was quite fair.
I didn't pay up in any event.
Got a shiner in that one. But I gave out one too, so it wasn't so bad.
" If one wants to have a friend one must also want to wage war for him: and to wage war one must be capable of being an enemy." - Fr. Nietzsche 'On The Friend' Thus Spake Zarathustra
His heart was visible, and the dismal sack that maketh excrement of what is eaten.
Posted On:1/19/2012 3:38pm
The first time I got in a fight on teh str33t I was probably 10 or 11. It was in a roller skating rink. Kid was picking on me for some reason. I forget why. I had enough and decided to commence the fisticuffs with a kick to the balls. Little to no effect.
He starts punching me and I fire back. I was giving more than I was taking and he was steadily retreating across the room. Then a bunch of other kids broke it up. So I was standing there in the crowd of kids feeling pretty good about how I did when the little fucker came out of the crowd like a ninjer. He caught me completely off guard and swung a pair of extra large rollerskates by the laces. Beaned me right in the head. It hurt. A lot.
Lesson learned on situational awareness.
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