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  1. #1
    stoogejitsu's Avatar
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    Simpsons and the Martial Arts.

    Hello everyone, Vargas asked me to make a thread dedicated to "The Simpsons" in which people can add any episodes, quotes, or scenes dealing with the Martial Arts from "The Simpsons," and I guess shows like "Family Guy," and "Southpark" are ok too. I know there are many Simpson's fans on this board so I think there may be at least a few responses, I'll start:

    They see a TV advertisement for a martial arts school (next to Shakespeare's
    Fried Chicken)...

    Akira: Hello, I am Akira. Ha! [breaks a cinder block with his forehead]
    That didn't hurt very much, because I know the ancient art of karate.
    [lying on his back with a giant rock on his chest, as two men pound the
    rock with sledgehammers]
    Karate focuses the mind and gives you self-confidence.
    People from all walks of life...
    Doctors...
    Man: Hai-ya! [breaks a cinder block with his forehead, in the process,
    breaking his glasses, which he forgot to take off]
    Akira: Home makers...
    Woman: Hoi-ya! [breaks a cinder block with her forehead]
    Akira: Landscape architects...
    Woman: Haiiiii-ya! [breaks a cinder block with her forehead]
    Akira: Choreographers...
    Man: Hoa! [breaks a cinder block with his forehead]
    Akira: High karate, at low, low prices.
    George Washington: I cannot tell a lie. This is a great deal!
    [smashes a wooden board with his head]
    [TV caption: Washington's Birthday Sale, $10 a lesson]
    -- TV advertisement

    next MA scene: Bart suffers through the karate lesson.

    Akira: We learn karate, so that we need never use it.
    Bart: Um, excuse me, sir. I already know how not to hit a guy.
    Can we break out the nunchucks?
    Akira: Ah yes, the impetuousness of youth. For now, let us read...
    Bart: Akira, my good man, when do we break blocks of ice with our heads?
    Akira: First, you must fill your head with wisdom, then you can hit ice with it.
    Bart: Yo, sensei. Can I go to the bathroom?
    Akira: You can if you believe you can.
    Bart: [leaving] Pay money to read books, pffft. The hell with this!
    -- Karate school, my favorite quote out of this is "High karate, at low, low prices."
    Last edited by stoogejitsu; 4/08/2004 1:28am at .

  2. #2

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    each (simp, south, family) has exactly one episode invling martial arts directly, and I can't think of a single incident in any episode other than those 3 :-(

  3. #3
    stoogejitsu's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Really, I can think of alot more references from the simpsons than just the episode I mentioned, but if it's that hard why not just funny martial arts references from telivision in general if people can't think of them from what I mentioned.

  4. #4
    Mostly, I just sit here. Mostly. hall of famestaff
    Stick's Avatar
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    On Snake Bashing Day, Homer practices Ma in the back yard. He did pretty well ^_^

    As for South Park MA; Tweak Vs. Craig.

    Cartman gets Craig trained up in sumo, and Stan and Kyle take Tweak t uncle Jimbo's boxing gym. Kick ass ^_^

  5. #5
    stoogejitsu's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Sweet, see what I mean, the examples are there, and plentiful.

  6. #6

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    In southpark, the Satan vs. Jesus boxing match...
    Canuckyokushin:

    These women can do back flips right over my head and still land on there feet .GRrrrrrrr!

    feedback:

    THAT'S NOTHING, I USED TO KNOW SOME 12 YEAR-OLDS WHO COULD FIT INSIDE A SUITCASE AND STAY ALIVE FOR 7 OR WAS IT 6 HOURS

  7. #7
    stoogejitsu's Avatar
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    Homer vs. Drederick Tatum, he fights Box Car Ira "He' a hungry young fighter, tonight he's fighting for a sandwich."

    then when he walks out in the robe that says "Opponent" to the song "why can't we be friends."

  8. #8
    Badness will not be rewarded supporting member

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    Don't forget the Old Skool Dragon Ballz SouthPark with Jesus versus Santa Claus.

  9. #9
    stoogejitsu's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Yeah, the original, I love that one.

  10. #10
    Mostly, I just sit here. Mostly. hall of famestaff
    Stick's Avatar
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    Not particularly an MA momment, but it was fuckig hilarious when Tken beat the **** out of Cartman at the end of the "Christian Rock Hard" episode.

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