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  1. #11
    Rene "Zendokan" Gysenbergs's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Katriona1992 View Post
    Its not just speech- its the awkward not-punch-at-full-strength-thing, looks-at-coach-with-a-wild-eyed-expression-when-they-get-called-on-thing too. I may have exaggerated a little, but its still there. Not all (definately not at my current school) places, but its still definately there.
    Do you wear a chestprotector in class when sparring?
    Because there's the major problem with sparring women in class: most of them wear only a sportsbra under their t-shirts.
    So as a man you won't hit the chest in such cases, they start complaining that I'm holding back. Then I'm not holding back anymore and they go complaining to the instructor that their nipples are stuck on their back!

    So whatever I do, I lose.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jiujitsu77
    You know you are crazy about BJJ/Martial arts when...
    Quote Originally Posted by Humanzee
    ...your books on Kama Sutra and BJJ are interchangeable.
    Quote Originally Posted by jk55299 on Keysi Fighting Method
    It looks like this is a great fighting method if someone replaces your shampoo with superglue.
    The real deadly:

  2. #12
    Robstafarian's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by 100xobm View Post
    I walked home three kilometres from judo with two broken toes and a blind eye. If I can do that, those motherfuckers can take some binka-binka to the face.
    That doesn't count; your Sinanju prevents your broken toes from striking the ground.

  3. #13

    Join Date
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Rene "Zendokan" Gysenbergs View Post
    Do you wear a chestprotector in class when sparring?
    Because there's the major problem with sparring women in class: most of them wear only a sportsbra under their t-shirts.
    So as a man you won't hit the chest in such cases, they start complaining that I'm holding back. Then I'm not holding back anymore and they go complaining to the instructor that their nipples are stuck on their back!

    So whatever I do, I lose.
    Back when my Goju ryu dojo did constant sparring, there was a girl in there who was a year older than me, but started around the same time. Every time I avoided hitting her in the chest, she'd complain I was holding back. But every time I went all out, she'd complain on how I was hurting her ta-ta's. One day, when she was on her "my nipples hurt" spree, one of our senior instructors came up to her and told her to "Shut up and block." Stupid little story, but your post just reminded me of when it happened.

  4. #14
    tao.jonez's Avatar
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    Feb 2009
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    "Sorry, can't spar, I have work tomorrow"

    I've heard this a few times. I always wonder what it means, since nobody goes home bloody and bruised. Well, a little bruised.
    "Never trust a quote you read on the internet" - Abraham Lincoln




  5. #15
    Ignorami's Avatar
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    Mar 2010
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    1,540
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    "I'm **** at sparring, be gentle!"

    I happily use this one all the time. Hopefully I'll be man enough to change it as I improve, but we'll have to wait and see.


    When life gives you lemons... BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!!

    "what's the best thing about aikido then?"
    "To be defeated by your enemies, to be driven by them from the field of battle, and to hear the lamentations of your women." ermghoti

  6. #16

    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    421
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    "I forgot my mouth guard."

  7. #17
    Sang's Avatar
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    Sep 2005
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Katriona1992 View Post
    Its not just speech- its the awkward not-punch-at-full-strength-thing, looks-at-coach-with-a-wild-eyed-expression-when-they-get-called-on-thing too. I may have exaggerated a little, but its still there. Not all (definately not at my current school) places, but its still definately there.
    Last year I hit a girl so hard she quit the sport (my 15% intensity level). Most girls want to remain delicate flowers while training combat sports and will give you pure hell if they get hit when sparring. This is why you get this excuse so often, personally I only spar chicks with fight records.

    My favorite excuse: "I'm too tired/unfit to spar" Then they join in for the very last round when everyone else is buggered.
    "Boxing is the art of hitting an opponent from the furthest distance away, exposing the least amount of your body while getting into position to punch with maximum leverage and not getting hit."
    Kenny Weldon

  8. #18
    Permalost's Avatar
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    Nov 2012
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    San Diego
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    13,092
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    "Take it easy on me- I'm an old fart and you're a strong young buck!"
    -a guy who was 40, when I was a 155lb 17 year old
    Quote Originally Posted by Cannon_6 View Post
    "I forgot my mouth guard."

  9. #19
    Siniq's Avatar
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    Oct 2007
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    the woods of eastern Europe
    Posts
    1,745
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I just took the cast off this broken tibia, so go easy on my left leg.
    me circa2008
    Quote Originally Posted by MrBadGuy
    The Dog kid's mom is parked next to me in the parking lot. He runs up and asks me a question. "Hey dude, where did you learn that stuff?"

    "That was grappling. Real MMA."

    "Where do I go for that?"

    I was a little shocked. Sure, he changed sides quickly, but I guess even a dog can realize it has more in common with the wolf than with the shephard.

    I give him the names of some BJJ schools in the area, and we go our separate ways.

  10. #20
    tao.jonez's Avatar
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    Feb 2009
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    NC
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    2,054
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I told someone not to punch me in my cancer right after I got the stitches out of my throat.

    Their look was priceless. I still fake like it hurts when I want to cheap shot someone.
    "Never trust a quote you read on the internet" - Abraham Lincoln




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