Page 1 of 11 12345 ... Last
  1. #1

    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    21
    Style
    Northern Praying Mantis
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Hello, I just escaped a cult.

    Hello, everyone.

    I just left a Kung fu school where I was awarded my black belt after 1.5 years, having never sparred in my life. I was taken out of classes after 2 months, taught to memorize scripts, overcome objections, and sign people up into "Fast track to Black Belt" contracts." I was personally awarded new belts arbitrarily.

    I would like to say at the worst, I left a McDojo. But....

    This school was something much more sinister.

    -The few staff members (myself included) were expected to devote at least 12 straight hours a day to the school, sometimes Sundays too. My "training" time was listening to the Sifu's stories of his glory days over and over.

    -After training, we were expected to do his errands, yardwork, housework, and childcare, no reimbursements for gas.

    -We weren't allowed to have second jobs, in spite of the meager income. We were told martial artists should be like gods, and gods don't have side jobs.

    -We were told not to be friends with the students. One staff member was beaten brutally when it was discovered he had accepted dinner requests at a student's home.

    -The same staff member was again beaten brutally to the point where he temporarily lost his hearing...due to a relatively minor business mistake.

    -In fact this staff member was beaten frequently...sometimes in front of the advanced students.

    -Most answers to the Sifu's questions were mocked as stupid/idiotic, terrified silence was mocked as having nothing going on upstairs.

    -We were told we were pathetic people before joining the school, that our lives would be meaningless if we left, that those outside of the school were merely waiting to die.

    -We were told we would not find this type of martial arts/teachings/interpretations of taiji anywhere else in the world...we were told even people in China do it wrong.

    -If staff tried to speak out, the Sifu would send out some of his top fighting students to "teach them a lesson."

    -Relationships must be approved by the Sifu.

    -The school has no affiliates, aside from the lineage from a grandmaster in China.

    -Any use of time other than being at the school (even taking up a college class) was declared evidence of "not being a serious martial arist, never going to be successful."

    -Breaking off from family members who are concerned about the situation is encouraged, "they just don't understand."


    The aforementioned staff member who is constantly beaten happens to be a very close friend of mine. He will not leave the school. The Sifu has convinced him he is worthless, stupid, incompetent, that he would be nothing if not for the "patience" his Sifu has shown in trying to "help" him. That staff member does everything for the school: teaches every singles class, does all the advertising, managing, etc. He jumps in terror when the caller idea has his Sifu's name on it. The Sifu often forgets what he mandated for the class plans and will violently lose his temper if he is displeased with the class structure...the class structure he himself designed a month ago.

    This friend of mine did not have a father growing up, and is delighted the certificate from the Bai Si ceremony declares their relationship to be "exactly that of a father and son." He says the Sifu is hard on him because he loves him like a son, that he is behaving in the strict manner Chinese fathers do. The Sifu is a white guy by the way.

    I don't know how to help my friend.

    Also, does anyone know if the discipleship really gives the Sifu a carte blanche to beat/belittle his students whenever he is displeased? I've been trying to do research but all I can come up with is the idea to honor traditions/the system/make a commitment to martial arts/etc.

    Thanks.

  2. #2

    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    163
    Style
    Shotokan
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by kynw261 View Post
    Hello, everyone.

    I just left a Kung fu school where I was awarded my black belt after 1.5 years, having never sparred in my life. I was taken out of classes after 2 months, taught to memorize scripts, overcome objections, and sign people up into "Fast track to Black Belt" contracts." I was personally awarded new belts arbitrarily.

    I would like to say at the worst, I left a McDojo. But....

    This school was something much more sinister.

    -The few staff members (myself included) were expected to devote at least 12 straight hours a day to the school, sometimes Sundays too. My "training" time was listening to the Sifu's stories of his glory days over and over.

    -After training, we were expected to do his errands, yardwork, housework, and childcare, no reimbursements for gas.

    -We weren't allowed to have second jobs, in spite of the meager income. We were told martial artists should be like gods, and gods don't have side jobs.

    -We were told not to be friends with the students. One staff member was beaten brutally when it was discovered he had accepted dinner requests at a student's home.

    -The same staff member was again beaten brutally to the point where he temporarily lost his hearing...due to a relatively minor business mistake.

    -In fact this staff member was beaten frequently...sometimes in front of the advanced students.

    -Most answers to the Sifu's questions were mocked as stupid/idiotic, terrified silence was mocked as having nothing going on upstairs.

    -We were told we were pathetic people before joining the school, that our lives would be meaningless if we left, that those outside of the school were merely waiting to die.

    -We were told we would not find this type of martial arts/teachings/interpretations of taiji anywhere else in the world...we were told even people in China do it wrong.

    -If staff tried to speak out, the Sifu would send out some of his top fighting students to "teach them a lesson."

    -Relationships must be approved by the Sifu.

    -The school has no affiliates, aside from the lineage from a grandmaster in China.

    -Any use of time other than being at the school (even taking up a college class) was declared evidence of "not being a serious martial arist, never going to be successful."

    -Breaking off from family members who are concerned about the situation is encouraged, "they just don't understand."


    The aforementioned staff member who is constantly beaten happens to be a very close friend of mine. He will not leave the school. The Sifu has convinced him he is worthless, stupid, incompetent, that he would be nothing if not for the "patience" his Sifu has shown in trying to "help" him. That staff member does everything for the school: teaches every singles class, does all the advertising, managing, etc. He jumps in terror when the caller idea has his Sifu's name on it. The Sifu often forgets what he mandated for the class plans and will violently lose his temper if he is displeased with the class structure...the class structure he himself designed a month ago.

    This friend of mine did not have a father growing up, and is delighted the certificate from the Bai Si ceremony declares their relationship to be "exactly that of a father and son." He says the Sifu is hard on him because he loves him like a son, that he is behaving in the strict manner Chinese fathers do. The Sifu is a white guy by the way.

    I don't know how to help my friend.

    Also, does anyone know if the discipleship really gives the Sifu a carte blanche to beat/belittle his students whenever he is displeased? I've been trying to do research but all I can come up with is the idea to honor traditions/the system/make a commitment to martial arts/etc.

    Thanks.
    Really this just sounds like an ego trip, that kind of behavior is like an abusive parent, or spouse. Getting the victim away is hard but can be done.

  3. #3
    TheMightyMcClaw's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Ann Arbor, MI
    Posts
    3,505
    Style
    MMA
    13
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Nah, this is pretty much straight up cult activity - his efforts to separate you from other forms of community (other jobs, family, lovers, etc.) is a cleeeeear sign of cultish behavior.
    I'm going to go ahead and guess that his martial skills are pretty fuckin' mediocre. If I were you, I'd find a muay thai or MMA gym, train for a year or so, get a couple fights under your belt, and then return to your old sifu's school and challenge him to a Gong Sau in front of his students, 70's Kung Fu movie-style.
    Motherfuckers like this need to be taken down a peg.
    The fool thinks himself immortal,
    If he hold back from battle;
    But old age will grant him no truce,
    Even if spears spare him.

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    163
    Style
    Shotokan
    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Walk in all Bruce Lee holding his sign and go "Whacho!!!" Shatter the bitch lol But yeah you see this with a lot of cults check out some of the info on Scientology and Jone's Town.

  5. #5
    battlefields's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Australia, Land of Oz
    Posts
    5,364
    Style
    BJJ/ MMA/ MT
    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    You need to return on that prick like him and his students molested your grandma.
    GET A RED BELT OR DIE TRYIN'.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    I think Battlefields and I had a spirited discussion once about who was the biggest narcissist. We both wanted the title but at the end of the day I had to concede defeat. Can't win 'em all.

  6. #6

    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    27
    Style
    BJJ
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    For starters I think you should post this in the investigation section, with information on the school.

  7. #7
    slamdunc's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    2,536
    Style
    TKD, CMA & American Kenpo
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Kebakaran View Post
    For starters I think you should post this in the investigation section, with information on the school.
    Yes, IF you can supply documentation. This place sounds like a real Hell-hole.



    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    You can not intellectualize your way to being a competent fighter.

  8. #8
    jnp's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Austin, TX
    Posts
    8,365
    Style
    BJJ, wrestling
    3
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by kynw261 View Post
    Also, does anyone know if the discipleship really gives the Sifu a carte blanche to beat/belittle his students whenever he is displeased? I've been trying to do research but all I can come up with is the idea to honor traditions/the system/make a commitment to martial arts/etc.

    Thanks.
    Welcome to Bullshido.

    I know the answer to your question. A martial art instructor is a teacher. Let me ask you a question, would you accept being beaten by one of your teachers back in high school? No? There's your answer.

    You are paying your instructor to provide you a service. You are the customer. Would you let the guy who cuts your lawn beat you? He's providing a service too. My point is that you need to realize that the martial art instructor and student relationship is the same as any other business to customer interaction. It is up to the business to keep the customer happy, not the other way around.
    Shut the hell up and train.

  9. #9
    His heart was visible, and the dismal sack that maketh excrement of what is eaten. supporting member
    Devil's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    11,154
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    ^^^What he said.

    OP - do you have, or can you obtain proof of your claims regarding this instructor?

  10. #10
    It is Fake's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    35,304
    Style
    xingyi
    5
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Okay, since no one has said this, quit being scared and go talk to the cops. Beaten to the point of hearing loss is a permanent disfigurement.

    I know plenty of people without a father, they didn't skew out to this extreme. There are some deeper issues going on with your friend. If you can't make him quit, and he is an adult, then you need to take this to the proper authorities. The other stuff is superfluous, but the beatings are abusive.

Page 1 of 11 12345 ... Last

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Log in

Log in