MA non progress and depression
This is only my second post to BS after my lengthy newbie introduction a couple of months ago. Although mostly uninteresting, and not the specific topic of this post, my own progress thus far in the colourful (mostly black with a hint of blue) multi-spectrum world of MA has been getting hopelessy addicted to this Moo-Tye world of training. In short - it's FUCKING AWESOME. I'm training 5 times a week now (3 x MT and 2 x Kung Fu). The missus has shown her distain for the multitude of bruises that have been awarded to my right shin and may be considering leaving me for someone who isn't down the gym most nights.
But on another note, last night I had a bit of a depressing time at my Kung Fu class. This concerns one of our practitioners who attends KF once a week for our hour and a half technique session on a Tursday evening. We'll call him Paul. Because that's his name.
Paul is about 20 years old, about 5' 7" at a guess and of slight build. A bit of a drip sometimes but a heart of gold type. Paul originally started at our KF class because he got punched in the face once by some random guy on the street. Knowing Pauls demeanour I highly doubt this was a result of provocation but I wasn't there so who knows.
Paul works at the same place as a) one of our brown belts; b) our KF instructor and c) a complete Jerkstain who goes by the name of Mikey. To ensure complete non-bias in this post I'll simply refer to him as JS.
I have had dealings with JS before so I know first hand that he is a complete douche. He once managed to melt my microwave and never replaced it. I fucking loved that microwave.
Because JS lifts a bit at the gym and has taken perhaps 3 or 4 boxing classes this has forged him a complete authority on all the subtle aspects of martial arts and is, without question, the undisputed baddass-of-the-century. This apparently includes his ability to kick our 5th dan BB instructor's ass (I haven't yet seen the photos or video for this claim) and bullying our subject of this post, Paul, while at work.
Paul is thinking about giving up the gym. He doesn't belive he is making any progress at all. This week JS apprently got him in a headlock and despite our training trying to teach SD from various locks/holds etc. he couldn't get out of it until released by JS. "What am I doing this for if I can't get out of a stupid headlock?!"
I sat down with Paul after the gym last night to find out what was up. He's got no girlfriend, writes alot of Sonic the Hedgehog fan-fiction (I have no evidence if this is erotic or otherwise), lives with his mum and sister, got punched once by some random street thug, doesn't have much of a social life outside of role playing a level 90 dwarf hunter (Stoutnhairy) in World of Warcraft and is getting pissed around by some Jerkstain at work. Basically - life sucks.
Now, I am fighting a natural urge to slap him in the face and tell him to man the **** up. What the **** do you expect of your life if you're not willing to put in a bit of hard work and effort to get what you actually want?! Do you even know what the **** you want in the firstplace!?
But I restrain myself. So after discussing the pros and cons of restoration shaman and their place in a raiding environment I do try and point out a few basic truths as far as I see it;
So - you got punched once? So what if you *did* know how to fight - someone with a couple of his freinds hit you once, had a laugh at your expense, but otherwise didn't escalate it further? (Note for the readers - I don't know the details and Paul didn't seem to want to talk about it). So if you *did* know how to fight do you really think it would of been a good idea to escalate the situation into a full on fight that was 3 on 1? What if it was 1 on 1 - does the other guy have a knife/gun/apache helicoptor on backup? If you look at it objectively - you're not dead or seriously hurt. You win.
"We'll never know I suppose."
As to getting bullied at work - report that fucker. They have security cameras don't they?!
"Yeah but nothing ever gets done about them. Maybe see you next Thursday, Bye!"
I sigh as Paul leaves to get off home and I'm left wondering - what should I do/say to help Paul out. Note: Our KF class only spars on Sundays and Paul has yet to show up meaning either he's unwilling to spar or unable to spar due to time/money. So our Thursday lessons are not a full workout for someone who wants significant physical improvement.
a) Don't touch this with a 50 foot pole. I am not a trained phsycologist and it seems to me Pauls problems are far deeper seated than I really want to or are able to help with.
b) Speak to our KF instructor to see if I can work some more physical pad work, maybe one on one with Paul so we can work a more demanding regime and Pauls can gain better confidence in his abilities.
c) Work on specific SD techniques to make sure JS doesn't keep messing with Paul at work. Maybe some nice effective head lock escapes?
d) Advise respeccing his level 90 Hunter to marksman to take advantage of higher personal dps and less combat pet reliance becuast the overall dps increase will generally outweight the lack of mobility in certain boss fights.
PS. I've signed up for my first competition! This is the BCCMA semi-contact sparring comp in Kent this September. I will try and get a video posted of my fight(s) for general critique and ridicule!
Hello Paul! Welcome to Bullshido, and sorry to hear about your headlock problem. I hear if you pre-cut your underwear, they'll rip before they cause too much damage during the wedgies.
Originally Posted by Stoneskin
"Your body must be like a stone, your mind... like a meatloaf."
Originally Posted by strikistanian
Originally Posted by Devil
Originally Posted by Plasma
So, two classes a week, one of which consists of what, punching air?
Leave that school, take Paul with you, study BJJ, Judo or wrestling if you want to be harder to headlock.
I am not Paul
Originally Posted by PointyShinyBurn
I have never been put into a headlock at the office.
Do techniques that work on th3 str33tz also work in the3 0ff1c3? Do I have to be careful of other envriromental dangers when fighting in the3 0ff1c3 such as the lower statistical chance of lava vs the higher chance of spotaneous laptop explosions or network cable garrottes?
I probably overstated the air punching curriculum. It's a mixed bag - working blocks, point sparring, self defence. Air punching lines and forms are in there too. Worthwhile? It's directly after my MT class so I use it an a bit of extra gym time and sometimes get called to pad work or as sparring partner for some of the newer people.
As to suggest that Paul should find a better class? I'm not sure it's my problem to be honest. He's a grown adult so who am I to suggest what he should do? The only impact on my own training is when I get partnered with him and have to wait on the mat for him to go grab a drink every 5 minutes.
I can only offer him advice based solely on an additional 15 years of life experience plus maybe 12 months MA experience. Not great credentials for dishing out the ways of the universe.
Short of a personality transplant, Paul will not become the fighting machine you're hoping will punch a whole through Jerkstain. He is what he is, and his meagre training in KF fulfills some motivation in him (which does not include "become a fighting machine").
You can't push rope.
If he wants to not get head-locked then he needs to grapple, live, with people who know how to grapple. My confidence in Kung Fu "self defence" headlock defences is, in general, low, and near zero if they're only dead drilled.
Originally Posted by Stoneskin
You were perfectly prepared to suggest what he ought to do when it consisted of working with your instructor, why is suggesting he seek proper instruction suddenly beyond the pale?
If he never goes live and mainly works compliant "self defence", point sparring and forms he doesn't need "confidence in his abilities" he needs to develop actual ability.
Last edited by PDA; 7/19/2013 9:30am at .
King without a crown
Kick the **** out of Mikey for wrecking your microwave, leaving him with multiple disabilities and thus physically unable to bully Paul.
Or what Chili Pepper said.
Does JS do Muay Thai?
Could you persuade Paul to try Muay Thai?
A kung fu guy who feels like he's stagnating and can't get out of a simple headlock sounds like an ideal candidate to suggest grappling to.
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