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  1. theAsthmatic is offline

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    Posted On:
    4/25/2013 8:57am


     Style: sambo

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Best martial art to fight a mountain lion?

    I had a rather odd argument with some friends at a bar, so I thought I would posit it here.

    Scenario: You are hiking in the mountains, completely alone without weapons and suddenly, a gigantic mountain lion attacks you from the bushes. Which martial art would you most rather have in your arsenal at this point.

    I think grappling should be automatically disqualified, because really, who wants to grapple a mountain lion? It will bite your face off. I am going with Monkey Kung Fu for the sheer intimidation value as it may scare the cat off.
  2. Diesel_tke is offline
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    Posted On:
    4/25/2013 9:53am

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     Style: stick,Taiji, mountainbike

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Well, I looked up Mountain Lions just to learn a little about them prior to popping off. Apparently their habitat can be anywhere from mountain slopes to coastal swamps. They need dense vegitation to survive.

    Based on that, I will have to go with Dog Brother's type stick fighting. Or long range stick fighting. The first thing to do would be to grab the first available stick. Then use footwork to try to keep distance from the lion. Keep the weapon between you and the animal, giving swift strikes to the head when it approaches. Maybe you could keep that up until it loses intrest or you kill it.

    From what I looked up, they are very teritorial. They like to hunt anything from a deer to rat. So odds are either that either it is hunting you for foot, in which case you are dead. Or, you have stumbled into it's territory. In which case you will use the stick to help keep distance while trying to back out of it's territory.

    Either way it is a bad situation, but this seems to be to be a decent option for survival.
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  3. BKR is offline
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    My dog is cuter and smarter than yours.

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    Posted On:
    4/25/2013 10:45am

    Join us... or die
     Style: Kodokan Judo

    2
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by theAsthmatic View Post
    I had a rather odd argument with some friends at a bar, so I thought I would posit it here.

    Scenario: You are hiking in the mountains, completely alone without weapons and suddenly, a gigantic mountain lion attacks you from the bushes. Which martial art would you most rather have in your arsenal at this point.

    I think grappling should be automatically disqualified, because really, who wants to grapple a mountain lion? It will bite your face off. I am going with Monkey Kung Fu for the sheer intimidation value as it may scare the cat off.
    You are dead, period. They grab you by the back of the neck or throat, end of story.

    Mountain Lions (aka Cougar) take down full grown deer and elk. Ever tried to wrestle even a small deer to the ground, let alone a pissed off buck? I have...forget about it.
    Falling for Judo since 1980
  4. Bezmond is online now

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    Posted On:
    4/25/2013 11:00am


     Style: Taijiquan, Karate

    4
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by BKR View Post
    They grab you by the throat, end of story
    Not with....KEYSI FIGHTING METHOD!
  5. csharp.negative is offline

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    Posted On:
    4/25/2013 11:12am


     Style: 1 technique 1000 times

    1
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    For real, a mountain lion will turn you into ground beef in ten seconds. I'll give you the BotD for the sake of this being the MA comedy forum.

    1. if I'm in the wilderness, I have weapons. Whether a deer, a mountain lion, or a sasquatch attacks me, I'm GOING to have a fixed blade knife and a folding knife on me. End of story.
    2. I will never be in the wilderness alone. If I trip and break my leg with nobody there to help, I could starve to death or possibly bleed out, if I don't just get eaten by a wild animal. If a mountain lion attacks me, I just have to be faster than the person with me (badum tsh).
    3. I have a deep respect for the woods and forest and the wilderness in general, so I know better than to aggravate a denizen of said wilderness. If a mountain lion comes at me aggressively, I'm going to high-tail it out of there because I'm being informed that I'm overstepping my boundaries.
    4. If the cougar really pounced on me from the bushes I have no opportunity to react unless it wasn't hidden well and I saw it before it happened. Otherwise it's going to pounce on me and crush me under its weight. An average cougar weighs a little less than I do, but if it gets the jump on me that's all it needs because it has claws and teeth.

    All that aside, if I were to fight a cougar for whatever reason, I'd just hope I had more fight in me than it has. "It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog."

    Also, hung ga has a tiger fork for this very instance. ;)
  6. Permalost is offline
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    pro nonsense self defense

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    Posted On:
    4/25/2013 11:16am

    supporting member
     Style: FMA, dumbek, Indian clubs

    2
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I carry a good sized fixed blade knife when I'm hiking so that would be option 1 (unless throwing rocks was an option). Probably a looping stab-and-shake behind the forelimb while being mauled, followed by vigorous cursing and first aid. But like BKR said, they're ambush predators so you'll probably be getting it in the back, probably from above. When I was a kid I spent some time on a survivalist uncle's land, and he said that the way to counter a mountain lion attack was to put your left forearm up horizontally so when it lunges at you it latches onto it, then you gouge its eyes out and/or kick it in the balls. Even as a kid I figured this was overambitious- if it did latch on like that, it'd probably drag you down, and it would almost certainly start clawing your face and/or genitals off while you try t3h d34dly. Since you're probably gonna get mauled unarmed anyway, you might as well just try with all your might to do one of those Sonny Chiba skull shattering karate chops. At least if it worked you'd have a badass story to tell.

    In the documentary "Grizzly Man", some unarmed jackass in Alaska (?) lives with giant bears that eventually eat him. In one encounter, a bear approaches him aggressively, and he swats it on the nose and yells "No, Mr Chocolate!", and instead of swatting his guts open, the bear leaves him alone. So, maybe doing almost anything will be enough to discourage some predators.
    Last edited by Permalost; 4/25/2013 11:26am at .
  7. ermghoti is offline
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    Posted On:
    4/25/2013 11:38am

    supporting member
     Style: BJJ+Sanda

    2
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Permalost View Post
    When I was a kid I spent some time on a survivalist uncle's land, and he said that the way to counter a mountain lion attack was to put your left forearm up horizontally so when it lunges at you it latches onto it, then you gouge its eyes out and/or kick it in the balls. Even as a kid I figured this was overambitious- if it did latch on like that, it'd probably drag you down, and it would almost certainly start clawing your face and/or genitals off while you try t3h d34dly.
    I'd suspect it would bat your arm down on the way to biting your throat. These aren't guard dogs, they're not interested in your limbs.

    Quote Originally Posted by Permalost View Post
    In the documentary "Grizzly Man", some unarmed jackass in Alaska (?) lives with giant bears that eventually eat him. In one encounter, a bear approaches him aggressively, and he swats it on the nose and yells "No, Mr Chocolate!", and instead of swatting his guts open, the bear leaves him alone. So, maybe doing almost anything will be enough to discourage some predators.
    I've heard of cats chasing off bears under some circumstances, I think they might be prone to confusion when faced with a seemingly inappropriate response to their displays of aggression. Probably no good on a feeding predator. Aggression displays evolved to avoid territorial/mating fights (which could cripple even the winner), where a feeding animal is simply determined to make you into poopies, not gauge the fight-worthiness of an intruder.
    Quote Originally Posted by strikistanian View Post
    DROP SEIONAGI ************! Except I don't know Judo, so it doesn't work, and he takes my back.
  8. Diesel_tke is offline
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    Posted On:
    4/25/2013 12:00pm

    supporting member
     Style: stick,Taiji, mountainbike

    7
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I think the best way to train for this would be to take a normal house cat and try to bathe it in the bath tub. Then take all the damage you receive and multiply that by 100 to estimate the results of a mountain lion attack. When you can handle the house cat with no damage, you move on to a stray cat. Then on to a bobcat. And so on until the ultimate test.
    Combatives training log.

    Gezere: paraphrase from Bas Rutten, Never escalate the level of violence in fight you are losing. :D

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  9. theAsthmatic is offline

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    Posted On:
    4/25/2013 12:35pm


     Style: sambo

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Diesel_tke View Post
    I think the best way to train for this would be to take a normal house cat and try to bathe it in the bath tub. Then take all the damage you receive and multiply that by 100 to estimate the results of a mountain lion attack. When you can handle the house cat with no damage, you move on to a stray cat. Then on to a bobcat. And so on until the ultimate test.
    I don't have a cat, but I am gonna try it on the neighbor's cat. Hopefully they will understand that I am just trying to perfect my martial arts skills and not some kind of psycho. :)

    The Sonny Chiba chop would probably work if you have hands like gnarled oaks. Which I don't having wasted my life with sambo (which is useless for fighting mountain lions). Still, while the density of a mountain lion skull compared to a bull is likely a lot less, it's a smaller target and due to the ambush it would be difficult to land a solid hit.
  10. franginho is offline

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    Posted On:
    4/25/2013 12:42pm


     Style: JiuJistu

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Can't you heel hock a mountain lion?

    Other point, most posters would be happy to get jumped up on by a *****....
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