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  1. #1
    Sri Hanuman's Avatar
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    Nov 2008
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    Chicago, IL
    Posts
    6,485
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Taiji, you've managed to make me feel dirty again.

    Blowing off steam, so bare with me.

    This morning, one of those rare occasions when I get up at 4 am to take care of business, I finish ahead of schedule, and decide to step outside for a brief stretch and maybe one Taijiquan form session (since I felt too fucking lazy to jump rope or lift... not enough seep, fatigue, and all that other excuise crap.)

    Luckily for me, there is a wide stretch of wooded area right outside my front door where I normally do my forms. So I'm out there by ~5, go through the typical BaDua Jin, chan si gong, and then move on to the TJQ form.

    When I'm about half way through, this old lady who's walking some mop-looking dog stops to stare. I'm pretty used to this, so I finish up the form, and start walking towards my front door, when she asks me if I'm doing Tai Chi.

    me: "yep, helps me start off the day."
    her: "I think you got a few of the moves wrong, like the one with the hand, you know the one in the beginning?"

    She does the peng, lu, ji, an, with the lu (rollback) completely extended and to far left side, and tells me that I need to reach all the way back to get a good stretch (yeah, I'm being a fucking nazi about it, sue me.)

    So I ask her what would be the application for reaching that far back when performing Lu, she gives me this blank stare, "I just told you, it's for the stretch"

    me: "what do you mean stretch?"
    her: "you know, for the yoga? We have this great yoga class by where I work, you should come by and give it a try."

    FUCKING OLD PEOPLE... ruining my CMA...

    /vent
    =================
    Kama Sutra blue belt.

    Quote Originally Posted by Emevas View Post
    I used to **** guys like you in prison.
    Quote Originally Posted by Rock Ape View Post
    Dude I kill people for a fucking living.

    Dipshit

  2. #2

    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Ecuador
    Posts
    1,565
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Did she take the deadly out of the sails of your failboat?

  3. #3
    Sri Hanuman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Chicago, IL
    Posts
    6,485
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Yes.
    Yes she did.
    =================
    Kama Sutra blue belt.

    Quote Originally Posted by Emevas View Post
    I used to **** guys like you in prison.
    Quote Originally Posted by Rock Ape View Post
    Dude I kill people for a fucking living.

    Dipshit

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Ecuador
    Posts
    1,565
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Sri Hanuman View Post
    Yes.
    Yes she did.
    Maybe she was teaching you the deadleh, but wanted you to discover the stretch yourself.

  5. #5
    Sri Hanuman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Chicago, IL
    Posts
    6,485
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    With a better stretch, my spiritual energy will be that much higher, allowing me to use more qi for the various dim mak applications required at my workplace.
    =================
    Kama Sutra blue belt.

    Quote Originally Posted by Emevas View Post
    I used to **** guys like you in prison.
    Quote Originally Posted by Rock Ape View Post
    Dude I kill people for a fucking living.

    Dipshit

  6. #6

    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    3,131
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Fight her. Make her prove she has game.

  7. #7

    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    559
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    If a fight kicks off my money is on the mop dog. They're vicious little bastards.

  8. #8

    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    183
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Sounds like she was hitting on you. Go make slappies with the GILF and absorb her POWAH!

  9. #9
    Permalost's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Location
    San Diego
    Posts
    13,092
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    If she's gonna correct your form so you stretch better, you should go to her yoga studio and correct her yoga postures for better fighting effectiveness.

  10. #10
    Sri Hanuman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
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    Chicago, IL
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    6,485
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Permalost View Post
    If she's gonna correct your form so you stretch better, you should go to her yoga studio and correct her yoga postures for better fighting effectiveness.
    That Downward Dog is too high. If you get lower, you can dodge a kick AND block a strike with your ass.
    =================
    Kama Sutra blue belt.

    Quote Originally Posted by Emevas View Post
    I used to **** guys like you in prison.
    Quote Originally Posted by Rock Ape View Post
    Dude I kill people for a fucking living.

    Dipshit

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