Mike Goldberg: Douchebag.

**Dr. Sleepless** · Posted On: 4/25/2009 3:08am

So tonight I met a guy who works with Goldberg on a daily basis. Awesome interesting things I learned tonight:

- Goldberg's UFC contract is for $1.5mil and has a time table of 2 years left. So we only have to listen to his bullshit for 2 more years. Yay? :(

- Goldberg is known as the industry "douche." But people hire him because he's "easy to work with." Also Goldberg is friends with the presiden to of Zuffa. Which is why they have that jackass working for them.

- Goldberg, during all of his tapings is always on his cell phone. Which is fine when they're prerecorded. But on something live like PPV UFC fights, where his stupid ass can't be saved by editing, he'll stop mid-sentence, like he does a lot on the PPV fights. According to my source, since the Iphone came out, Goldberg has become a lover of text messaging and will spend the entire fight messaging people. Which I guess kind of explains why his announcing of the fights suck so much.

So, two more years. :(

**Hesperus** · Posted On: 4/25/2009 3:35am

Sarcastro: Gets a chubby for hearsay.

***Omega Supreme*** · Posted On: 4/25/2009 4:04am

You met Scott?

**The Fake Macoy** · Posted On: 4/25/2009 9:36am

To be honest, I wouldn't be that surprised if he ends up sticking around after. For example, CBC's Hockey Night in Canada was usually broadcast by Harry Neale and Bob Cole, who were both old and sucked at their jobs. Even though they were supposed to retire, they ended up sticking around for like, 3 more years. I wouldn't get your hopes up that Goldberg will be gone when his contract ends.

**Ka-Bar** · Posted On: 4/25/2009 9:41am

Goldberg's not going anywhere.

JP · Posted On: 4/25/2009 9:43am

You should have the option to mute his ass though. He really kills it for me.

They should play up the times when he says something and Rogan just says: "What?"

I keep expecting, and dearly wishing for, the day when Joe gets fed up and we get to hear Goldberg getting choked the **** out on live television.

**Hesperus** · Posted On: 4/25/2009 9:47am

In a universe where John Madden exists, I just can't summon the will to complain.

**Dr. Sleepless** · Posted On: 4/25/2009 10:37am

Originally Posted by Hesperus

Sarcastro: Gets a chubby for hearsay.

Nope.

Originally Posted by Omega the Merciless

You met Scott?

No. I'll tell you about it next time I'm around. But, it's a producer for one of the many shows Goldberg does.

I did not know that douche canoe got around that much.

Another interesting Goldberg fact:

Goldberg drives a used Bentley he bought from someone at Zuffa. Goldberg lives in Arizona on a McMansion he bought for about $250,000 on a man-made lake. He is living his frat boy dream.

**elipson** · Posted On: 4/25/2009 12:48pm

A friend of mine is a cousin of this guy. She says he is super nice.

He has got a nice clear voice, doesn't stutter. I think he does just fine. Or more to the point, I'm not sure anyone else would do much better. Putting him and Rogan together is hilarious. Goldberg, getting the names of techniques wrong; Rogan, calling him an idiot without being obvious about it and then generally doing a shitty job at commentating.

We got one guy who is a good and clear speaker but knows little about the actual sport, and then we have a comedian who is arguably an expert on the sport but who sucks balls at commentating. What other duo would be so perfectly matched?

**Goju - Joe** · Posted On: 4/25/2009 1:23pm

Originally Posted by Sarcastro

- Goldberg is known as the industry "douche." But people hire him because he's "easy to work with." Also Goldberg is friends with the presiden to of Zuffa. Which is why they have that jackass working for them.

(

I tried reducing this statement to symbolic logic

It equals 0