Ignoring the demands of a training partner?
I've run into an unusual problem and I was hoping I could get some advice from more experienced people.
I have a decent grappling background in sambo. There aren't any sambo schools around where I live so I joined a BJJ gym. I am 6'2" and weight 260 lbs (I am not fat). I've been doing BJJ for 3 years now and feel like I am making good progress.
From day one, my coach has been telling me not to use strength and instead to work on improving my position through technique. I took that to heart and I feel that I get a lot more out of a training session by using my head instead of just powering my way through. Trying to power a technique doesn't really work on someone stronger or more technical than me anyway, so it makes sense.
So here is the problem. There is a girl who attends the same classes I do. Every time we roll she keeps making statements like "You can go harder than that." or "I am not a delicate flower." etc. She will even do this when learning a new technique, before really understanding the mechanics.
I can submit her pretty much at will though. For example she will tap from me just squeezing my legs together from guard. So if I go harder, neither of us will learn anything and the coach specifically told me not to hulk out. She has yet to put me in any dangerous position or threaten a submission. So when I work my techniques it's always a slow, controlled pressure type of game. It's starting to annoy me that she keeps telling me to up my game when she can't really even match the pace I am already going at.
I've asked the coach about it and he said to just pay it no mind and she's like that with everyone, even the black belts. I've tried to pay it no mind, but it's difficult for me on a personal level.
I should make it clear that this is not about her being a girl. There are some girls at the same gym that are training for pro-fights that make me work like a dog just to keep up. I've asked her to at least submit me a few times before giving me advice, but it didn't work. Does any one know how I should approach this matter?