No response from Bruce yet, huh? Or is the UFC shielding their investment? I think we all can see what is going on here.
I'm the people's champion, the next generation, smoother, sexier and with a bigger p...resence.
There needs to be a revamp. Something fresh. We've heard enough "IT'S TIIIIIIIIME!" to last a life time. We need something funky, hip. Something that speaks to the youth, what with their 8 mile rap battles and basketball caps on backwards. I speak fluent yoof. It's a bastardisation of hip hop slang and Internet terms. Oh em gee, yo. See! Perfect diction.
I even have my catchphrase sorted:
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, JOIN ME AS WE'RE TREATED TO A NIGHT OF MIXED MARTIAL ARTS ACTION, WHERE THE PACE IS FAST AND THE WEAK DON'T LAST!!!
I'll go with that. Buffer and his mouthful of nuts can now scamper up the nearest tree. "It's Time!" For this squirrel to find a mate, raise little squirrelites, and feckin retire. He has always sucked as an announcer. Battlefields, you're up my friend. Make us proud.
Provided atheistmantis' friend is female and at least a 6/10, or a 5/10 but gives good head, I'll happily be up her.
Who am I kidding? As long as she's female.
Anything with a heart beat? The life of an MMA announcer is a glamorous one. You are the MC and therefore loved by all the ladies. There's nothing like a man in a tuxedo, so very James Bond.
Songified remix video of this or it didn't happen!
Sounds pretty fun.