Manabi-Masho Ju-Jitsu Still Haunts Me
I remember one particularly ****-errific training session with Manabi-Masho. On a lark, the instructor decided we would be doing some "real" ninja training (Manabi-Masho, as taught in North Carolina, has heavy elements of Ninjitsu). I'm twelve years old, chubby, I own a pair of tabi (sweet ninja-shoes), and I'm told I'm going to learn true ninja techniques. Bitching!
We went to the instructor's home (which looked like one of those fake brick houses, like it was originally a double-wide trailor, but someone placed bricks around it to make it more middle-classed), where we started learning the secrets of Ninja Stealth. Helpful hints like "moving debris out of your way as you sneak." Not walking aroung said debris, but delicately picking it up and moving it over. This is a very flexible technique, as you can effectively apply it to a single dried leaf, a stick, or even a rock!
We then covered treeborne (hooah!) ambushes. That's right. Lurking in a branch 5-10 feet off the gound, and effective ways to pounce on your enemy. Of course, this segment of instruction was demonstration only, and performed from a very low branch so the instructor wouldn't kill the hapless uke with his mad ninja skillz.
We also covered evasive rolling, and, my favorite, evasive jump-rolling. You know, for when you have to jump over the Super Secret Spike Pit of Soul-Crushing Doom.
That is just one of my training experiences. As others have noted, Manabi is pure, 100%, unadulterated McDojo bull semen. Of course, as always, we warmed up and cooled down with the infamous speed punches.
Another favorite technique that was commonly employed was the "bow and arrow" armbar, performed standing. The idea is to catch the uke's arm as he thows. As he throws and you catch, you are stepping deep into his flank, almost behind him. Bring his arm over his shoulder, cranking his wrist/elbow towards you, and using your free hand to push against his neck. This resulted in a cool body position for you, because your uke now looks like your fleshy bow-bitch. Very cool and very painful, but the issue is the amount of time getting to the final awesome pose.
I had to learn the hard way that it doesn't work nearly as well as it should while slap-boxing in junior high with a guy that had a good 50lbs and six inches on me. I didn't win.
Oh, I just thought of another one: If someone is going for a shoot (you know, leg-grabbing for the takedown), fall on your back and stick a leg out. He'll commit involuntary seppukku on your foot-spear. No mention, at any time, from anyone in there about "sprawling."