PDA

View Full Version : How to Start Your Very Own Bullshido Spin-Off Forum in Three Easy Steps!



Pages : [1] 2 3 4

Phrost
7/26/2010 3:05pm,
http://www.bullshido.net/images/crying.jpg

So Timmy, you're really upset! Those big meanies at Bullshido have not given you the respect you feel you deserve? Well we've got the solution for you!


Start your own Web Forum!

http://www.bullshido.net/images/spinoff0.jpg


That's right, you can start your own web forum where you never have to read the posts of anyone who disagrees with your ideas or calls you on bullshit, ever.

Did I mention ever? That's right, your own web forum will give you the ability to:



Lock Threads. Discussion not going your way? Just lock it down! And while you're at it, make sure you get the last word in before you do, for maximum effect!
Delete Posts. Is that post not respectful enough? Did the person say "asshole" instead of "butthole"? Did they call themselves a "Pain in the Ass" instead of a "Pain in the Donkey"? Well, just like the Catholic Church, you can erase any proof that a traumatic event ever happened!
Establish Your Worth. Were you feeling like a minnow in a big pond? Were you not made a moderator, administrator, or even just considered a core member of the site? Well you can fix that buddy! By selecting an option from a simple drop-down menu, you can be given all the authority one can handle. And every time you exercise that authority, it's like scoring a touchdown with the Nuclear Football! You'll practically soil the front side of your underwear with the excitement.



http://www.bullshido.net/images/spinoff1.jpg
But how do I make this happen?


Don't fear Timmy, this is the easy part. Just follow our step-by-step instructions and you too can validate your existence while sheltering your views from disagreeable people in no time!

Step 1. Be the Butthurt. You can't start your own spin-off forum without sincerely being butthurt about something. What that something is doesn't really matter. It could be the fact that people aren't using your balls as a swingset, to the fact that someone called you an old coot. Maybe you were made fun of for believing in Astral Projection. Or perhaps you're a racist who attacks women you outweigh by eighty pounds. It's even possible that you're having an emotional crisis when you realized that age has rendered all your hard-learned combat skills essentially impotent should an angry young bull want to slap your girlfriend on the rear when you're out for a night on the town.

Regardless, as long as you sincerely believe in your cause, it doesn't matter what it is - heck, it doesn't even have to have a basis in rational fact.

http://www.bullshido.net/images/spinoff2.jpg
The amount of irrational emotion is the key!


That's the secret! Don't waste your time doing all that stupid "thinking". A real spin-off site feeds on hurt feelings, fear, and anger to grow; just like Vigo from Ghostbusters 2!

Step 2. Inspirational Figure. It doesn't matter if you're just some schlub, as long as you find someone who's not as schlubby as yourself to look up to. Yes, the second key to creating a successful spin-off site is to identify an individual who has a bunch of other people going bareback on his netherparts.

Why do you need this? Because, nobody gives a crap about what you think, right? You wouldn't be in this position if they did. And that's why getting someone who others might give a crap about, as the cornerstone of your new spin-off, is absolutely essential!

Remember, you're not starting a mainstream movement here, geared at people who can handle conflicting opinions and open discourse.



http://www.bullshido.net/images/spinoff3.jpg
You're going after the fringe!


So fringe it up! Make sure the Peter on which your church forum is built is a certified character. Reasonable men don't make for great figureheads. Seriously, have you ever seen a pundit on TV that was someone you wanted to follow (unless you're into raping and murdering girls in 1990)?

Your new leader needs to be a calculated cross between Barack Obama and Fred Phelps. The amount of batshit necessary will be something you can decide on your own. It can range from "Lives in a van down by the river" to "Sings the hymns just a little bit too loudly in church". But what it can't be, is missing.

Step 3. Pass Out the Kool-Aid. Any group needs refreshments to keep up its strength. And while the cake may be a lie, the kool-aid must never be. You should always have at least one flavor (preferably Red), ready to go in large buckets, any time more than two people are actively posting on your new forum.

But it's not just the kool-aid itself which is important.

http://www.bullshido.net/images/spinoff4.jpg

Mix it up!



A good batch of fringe group kool-aid can't just be two quarts water, 4 scoops sugar, and a packet, stir vigorously. You have to add in "extra" ingredients if it's going to taste believable. Some of these ingredients include:



Smugberry Juice - helps you feel both accomplished and justified in your decision and eases the pangs of loneliness from missing out on discussions with more than the same five or six people over and over again.
Vanilla Extract - Because pretty much everyone on your new community is going to be white.
Sriracha Sauce - Your members may be all suburbanite goobers, but that won't stop you from expressing your genuine Asianosity!
Holy Water - it's much better than tap water, and lets you feel like you're not just blindly groping in the dark for answers.


By following the above steps, you'll be off to running your own spin-off forum within about twenty-four hours!


http://www.bullshido.net/images/spinoff0.jpg


(Of course, if said forum lasts twenty-four months you'll be setting a record.)

Happy Foruming!

Soldiermedic
7/26/2010 3:11pm,
I hope these were stock photos...not just ones you happened to have on your digital camera.

BaronVonDingDong
7/26/2010 3:19pm,
Did something happen? Links to butthurt spin-off forums plz.

Snake Plissken
7/26/2010 3:25pm,
that's it.
that's the fucking final fucking straw.
**** this ****.
I'm leaving.

Phrost
7/26/2010 3:30pm,
that's it.
that's the fucking final fucking straw.
**** this ****.
I'm leaving.

That's not how haiku works dude. Should be:

The final straw
This fucking **** is the one
I am now leaving.

Sheesh.

JudOWNED
7/26/2010 3:35pm,
So, did Cy start his own forum, or did rudy just resurrect his after finally being banned from here?

Hiro Protagonist
7/26/2010 3:38pm,
I think this is the cause for Phrost's discontent:

http://blackmoor.mystara.us/forums/

I would have chosen Sociocide, but my gaming group voted that it was too generic for them...







Errh, no, really, obviously it's about Mark Tripp's new forum:

http://marktripp.proboards.com/index.cgi

While I don't see anything bad about Mark starting his own board, I hope this doesn't become another fortress of the butthurt, since the sensei apparently left this site in bad blood.

Phrost
7/26/2010 3:47pm,
Honestly, I just find the whole situation hilarious. Especially following my GET OUT message the other day, with people who I never would have guessed in a million years, somehow thinking I'm directly referencing them.

Let's look at what I posted:


If you can't handle people questioning your credentials: GET OUT.

If you don't like it when people refuse to kiss your ass, based on your own expectations and sense of entitlement to stand beyond criticism: GET OUT.

If you are considering leaving the website: GET OUT.

You'd have to be a rare combination of spectacular asshole and completely self-honest to think this applies to you.

It's not even that funny of a reference. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCsKEGS4L0g)


(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCjGAgNHJ1c)

docwolfe
7/26/2010 3:48pm,
I think this is the cause for Phrost's discontent:

http://blackmoor.mystara.us/forums/

I would have chosen Sociocide, but my gaming group voted that it was too generic for them...







Errh, no, really, obviously it's about Mark Tripp's new forum:

http://marktripp.proboards.com/index.cgi

While I don't see anything bad about Mark starting his own board, I hope this doesn't become another fortress of the butthurt, since the sensei apparently left this site in bad blood.


It is actually being moderated pretty well. There is no us versus them mindset there.

Here, however...

Hiro Protagonist
7/26/2010 4:00pm,
It is actually being moderated pretty well. There is no us versus them mindset there.

Here, however...

Oh, STFU n00b.


Honestly, I just find the whole situation hilarious. Especially following my GET OUT message the other day, with people who I never would have guessed in a million years, somehow thinking I'm directly referencing them.

Yeah, the exodus - if it is on - would be rather strange, especially after the entire bitchfest last month seems to have calmed down.



You'd have to be a rare combination of spectacular asshole and completely self-honest to think this applies to you.

Hehe, I fit for both of those, and guess what? I'm staying.

I'll simply wait until I collect at least 95 infraction points and then send the key to my account to Rudy, for his enjoyment.

omoplatypus
7/26/2010 4:06pm,
If you are considering leaving the website: GET OUT.

months ago, i stuck around because chuck had asked me to as a personal favor to him.

i read your above quote, and took your advice. nobody has said anything negative about you or bullshido on tripp's forum.

oh well, i thought i might be able to participate in both forums, but i guess not.

peace out, and if you want to keep up with me, you know where to find me.

Phrost
7/26/2010 4:13pm,
months ago, i stuck around because chuck had asked me to as a personal favor to him.

That's just even more hilarious. You bumblefucks have totally made my Monday rule.



i read your above quote, and took your advice. nobody has said anything negative about you or bullshido on tripp's forum.


Actually, there was a post or two, but you guys deleted them. And then there were (are?) Tripp's own posts which are much more hostile than what I contributed over there (admittedly for my own amusement).

No, no hostility at all; except the fact that I have my own subforum over there to which you've moved all of my threads and posts, even the ones where I gave you the benefit of the doubt that you weren't power TRIPPing nazi assholes, locking down all my threads after Tripp got in the last word.



oh well, i thought i might be able to participate in both forums, but i guess not. We're coming to the same conclusion; you and a few others seem to be lacking in the degree of fortitude this one requires.



peace out, and if you want to keep up with me, you know where to find me.

Yes, we all know where to find you, Administrator on MarkTripp's ProBoard Dot Com Mark Tripp 1923 All Rights Reserved.

docwolfe
7/26/2010 4:23pm,
I don't know what to say to someone who expresses an opnion. Waaaah!

I thought so.

Later, Bullshido.

Phrost
7/26/2010 4:33pm,
I thought so.

Later, Bullshido.

You really only have one tool in your toolbox, don't you?

They're deleting your other posts over there lickety-split... as fast as a red wave, or some kind of protection squadron. Otherwise I would have quoted where you made the exact same post in response to something I said.

Also, you have 18 posts here. Mark Tripp may have some (not really) justification in throwing a (three or four) temper tantrum(s) and making an "I'm quitting this place forever" post, but you sure as **** don't.

Odacon
7/26/2010 4:34pm,
Jesus I need to keep up with current events a bit more, unless this turns out to be a "it was a setup all along, hahaha". Seriously a TL;DR version of events?

Phrost
7/26/2010 4:40pm,
Jesus I need to keep up with current events a bit more, unless this turns out to be a "it was a setup all along, hahaha". Seriously a TL;DR version of events?

Not much to understand. Over the duration of the time Tripp has been posting here, he's posted several times that he was quitting because he wasn't being treated like he felt he deserved.

Combine that with other people being all sandy-snatchy over the senior staff not kow-towing to how they thought the site should be run, and several other conflicting agendas, and you've got a handful of people who took their toys and made their own clubhouse in the woods where the meanies couldn't bother them.

It's basically exactly like Phil Elmore, Ronin69, JFS, Rudy Abel, and a few others that I stopped even paying attention to after that point because, really?

The only reason I took notice of this was, honestly, because I thought better of the people who hopped bare-assed onto this particular bandwagon made out of Mark Tripp's scrotum. And I don't like to be wrong in my assessment of people's character.

Also, I get bored easily and this was an excuse to have fun at someone's expense.