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View Full Version : Douchebag of the Month - July 08: Quinton "Rampage" Jackson



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Phrost
7/25/2008 11:19am,
This is the first installation of our new feature "Douchebag of the Month" and to be honest I wanted it to be about Barack Obama.

"What the hell does Barack Obama have to do with MMA, the Martial Arts, or Physical Training?" you may ask. Nothing, I'm just pissed that "Mr. Change" decided to vote with the other status-quo maintaining jerkbags in Congress to give telecom companies immunity for spying on us among other things.

But unfortunately, our editors rejected the idea. (Ok, we don't really have editors, it was just some random person on my IM list who thought it would be a bad idea. On the other hand, that person likes Kimbo Slice.) And regardless, that kind of crap belongs on our Politics forum, Sociocide (http://www.Sociocide.com), anyway.

So the pressure was on to find someone to which we could hand out our first Golden Nozzle award for Douchey Behavior in a Fighting-related Activity.

Then Rampage decided to plow through traffic in a monster truck with his picture on it and lead police on a chase through LA.

In the words* of Outkast:
I'm sorry Mr. Jackson (OOOOH)
I am for REAL
Never meant to call you a douche
But your LA driving forced us to...

http://www.douchebagalert.com/db/pics/1217002034.jpg (http://www.douchebagalert.com/db/x/1217002034.asp)Quinton, Quinton, Quinton; for shame. I know it must hurt for a self-described "Black Man" to lose his championship to someone named after a founding member of the KKK**. That doesn't mean it's a good idea to act a fool in a town already known for pulling large minorities out of their vehciles and beating them. Wouldn't a nice trip to a day spa have relieved just as much tension? Hell, you could probably even spring for a happy ending... at least one a lot happier than laying face down on the pavement with cops pointing their guns at you.

So it's with a heavy and reluctant heart that we must award you the inagural Douchebag of the Month award for your driving shennanigains. Christ man, you managed to beat out Gary Shaw and Melvin Guillard*** for this award. Maybe it's time for a teensy-little break from the spotlight?


*Not really.
**Nathan Bedford Forrest, but this is just a wild guess and a joke shamelessly ripped from a corny Tom Hanks movie. Still, Griffin is from Georgia...
***Perennial contender for DBotM.

studentoftheart
7/30/2008 4:32pm,
wow i like rampage as a fighter

UpaLumpa
7/30/2008 4:38pm,
A guy just can't try and work through a mental breakdown in peace these days.

FickleFingerOfFate
7/30/2008 4:39pm,
WTF is a bigger than life dude supposed to do to relieve stress then?

Rancid Pantaloons
7/30/2008 5:19pm,
maybe the next months douchebag will be more juicy

Feryk
7/30/2008 5:24pm,
Well, at least he hasn't done a press conference full of tears and blaming Dana, the UFC or space aliens for his behavior. That's something in his favor.

Zendetta
7/30/2008 6:01pm,
^Good point. I personally will not lose respect for him until he cries in public and apologizes for letting down the fans, his family, himself, and of course Jeebus.

HappyOldGuy
7/30/2008 6:09pm,
^Good point. I personally will not lose respect for him until he cries in public and apologizes for letting down the fans, his family, himself, and of course Jeebus.

If he blames the net gun I will worship him as a god.

studentoftheart
7/30/2008 6:15pm,
If he blames the net gun I will worship him as a god.
ha ha ha :5yeah:

Zendetta
7/30/2008 6:48pm,
LOL, netgun was awesome.

partyboy
7/30/2008 7:51pm,
at least he didn't hurt anybody....


jethuth

maxthegeek1
7/31/2008 12:11am,
He's not a douche bag, he's depressed. He had a mental breakdown, and is being held in a psychiatric hospital. He was really irresponsible, but I don't think its because he's a douche bag, I think its because he's having a really hard time. Supposedly, he's depressed because of his weight.

Steve
7/31/2008 12:22am,
WHAT? I didn't quite hear your post.

It is Fake
7/31/2008 12:23am,
He's not a douche bag, he's depressed. He had a mental breakdown, and is being held in a psychiatric hospital. He was really irresponsible, but I don't think its because he's a douche bag, I think its because he's having a really hard time. Supposedly, he's depressed because of his weight.
Ahhhh hearsay. Big size four hearsay.

Permalost
7/31/2008 1:18am,
WTF is a bigger than life dude supposed to do to relieve stress then?
Maybe he could fight people. Maybe even get money for it.

Moleculo
7/31/2008 1:21am,
He's not a douche bag, he's depressed. ... he's depressed because of his weight.
He wouldn't weigh so much if he took that heavy chain off his neck.

On second thought, the chain is probably cutting off the circulation to the anti-douchebag receptors in his brain.