I want to get bigger! What's the best whey or protein shake to do so?

Find some big biker dude and suck him dry.

I recommend saline injections

Steak.

Chicken.

Fish.

Turkey.

Lots of good vegetables.

Basically, get your diet in line before fucking around with supplements. Real food is cheaper and tastes better, anyway.

It might also be good to mention that eating food will make you fat unless you are actually lifting weights or some equivalent strength training.

I recommend saline injections

Womp, Womp, Whaa!

Steak.

Chicken.

Fish.

Turkey.

Lots of good vegetables.

Basically, get your diet in line before fucking around with supplements. Real food is cheaper and tastes better, anyway.

Understood. Is tuna great? i heard it wasn't due to high mercury levels.

Unless you eat tuna by the can, I wouldn't worry too much about mercury levels. I eat it several times a week because it's cheap and awesome.

If you're worried about mercury, you can eat fish that are lower on the food chain, like sardines and anchovies. They're a little more expensive and don't taste as good though.

Eat the foods where telling you to and let your body tell you whats working. You want to eat alot and turn it into muscle not fat. Try to weigh yourself at night and at morning and watch your waist. If the weight is going in the wrong spots then the diet might need a few changes. Don't overtrain either, you'll get there soon enough.

"the only thing promised in life is death, everything else is achievement"

Mercury is very dense, so it will help you gain mass.

20-rep squats and milk. All you need.

From http://bulkingup.moonfruit.com:

"Gaining muscular bodyweight is a popular subject for a lot of lifters. Here are a few important points to remember.

1. Keep your routine short and heavy.
2. Work the BIG muscles. Do squats, deadlifts, clean & press, dips, chins, etc. You don't need curls, triceps extensions, or any small exercises. Use your energy on the big stuff. Your arms will still grow!
3. Don't work out too often. Two or three times a week is perfect for gaining.
4. Get plenty of sleep.
5. Get plenty to eat--but no junk food.
6. Drink a LOT of whole milk.
7. A key point: High reps with heavy weights is more stimulating than the usual lower rep routines."

Note that .#7 means more stimulating for sarcoplasmic hypertrophy, not sarcomere, which if you want mass is what you're after.

I like to sprinkle my oatmeal with depleted uranium for mass...I find it helps me bulk quicker than the mercury out of thermometers.

GG

I eat rocks as snacks.

Note that .#7 means more stimulating for sarcoplasmic hypertrophy, not sarcomere, which if you want mass is what you're after.

What does that mean?

Don't worry about it, just do it. And I should correct myself, you can add a lot of strength with 20-rep squats as you progressively keep tacking on weight, 5-10lbs each workout.

I don't get the mentallity behind that. Can't I just add 5-10lbs each work out regardless of how many reps I do? Or does doing the 20 rep squat increase your strength so much that you CAN do it without "feeling" it?